Real Americans eat KFC*

*With a fork and knife on their private jet and have their assistant tweet a picture of it.

Clinton 65,844,954

If you think they’re going to blame their Trump vote when their benefits get cut, you’re more optimistic than I am.

These things do happen. I feel horrible for everyone involved.

Lot of white supremacists use 88 as a substitute for HH (8th letter of the alphabet). Heil Hitler. Yes, I’m aware it’s fucking stupid.

I’m guessing a Dale Jr. reference.

how is that hitler related? pardon my ignorance...

People born in ‘88 aren’t grown men. They’re still chi-

I guess you should add “Learn Krav Maga” to that list.

I’ve always been more a fan of the poor-man’s door alarm; a cup full of change balanced on the doorknob

This would be quite effective were it not for the fact that “women: you have to treat them like sh*t” is the subtext for the entire Republican party.

This is on Jezebel because... his mother was a woman?

“Multiple points of origin”, maybe a family lit the place up together.

Nothing says “I’m a Christian” louder than nonsensical intolerance, leaving your family on Christmas, to commit law breaking assholery bordering on homicidal rage!

This. ^ This is what happened to me, and I’m pissed about it. All of my kid’s friends have one. The teacher used one at school. Now I have to deal with that creepy ass elf this year, because he was begging for one, and was heartbroken when I said I didn’t think we would get one. So, one more thing for me to do every…

Yeah. I did not want to do the creepy elf on the shelf at all. But then my middle child came home and made a little elf bed and wrote a letter to Santa. Her friends at school told her that was how to get an elf at your house. So we’ve had one for 3 years now. Thanks school.

I wouldn't say the kids are picked on, they just feel left out. Weirdly, several of my Muslim students had elves even though they don't celebrate Xmas.

My kids are still too little to know about this elf stupidity. But my students are into it hardcore and since November I’ve had to hear about what their damned elves are doing every night. But I also saw that the kids whose parents don’t do the elf were sad about it. So I know I’ll eventually be suckered into this…

“Please describe the accident.” “Trump Bump.”

I'm not saying you're all wrong, or that your prediction of failure might eventually come to pass, but you may be looking for buyers in the wrong places.