Well, there was Whitewater, there was “Benghazi,” I’m sure she’s jaywalked at least once in her lifetime, and if your willing to believe anything, there was that underground children sex trade organization she had going on in some pizza joint. ...but... ...yeah! her emails! Lock her up!!!

COTD

Actually, the man is how old? How senile? He probably thinks one computer requires a massively huge building in order to house it. It’s probably where he kept his, forgetting how to send an email via punch cards. 

A stricter border has actually caused more problems than solve them. People would go back and forth all the time, but when it got harder, people stayed, fearing they would never be allowed back in if they returned home.

Same age you need to be to legally buy a gun. Gun loving Republican teenage pseudo-adult whos been disowned... ...if he hasn't changed his ways by age 17. Get him some counseling before it’s too late, and he ends up on the news. 16, if you believe he’s REALLY going down a dark path.

I am pretty sure the biggest reason anyone who isn’t a millennial who uses FB first signed up because their idiot offspring told them to. In the early years, the site was just for Ivy League college students, but then opened up to anyone who had a .edu email address. It was nothing special, nothing new. In fact, when…

That’s a little different. In the 20s-40s, buying a radio was like buying a car. It was pretty expensive. And from the 50s-60s, televisions were the same way. It took a long time for the masses to adopt, and when they did, both platforms were pretty limited on what was broadcasted back then. But Facebook shows up…

True. I hear “Did you see on Facebook...?” from people both older AND younger than me. ...AND from different voting parties. They ask me these questions as if I finally caved in and signed up for that bull crap.

I’d hate to be involved in Godwin’s law, but immigrants are this decade’s Jews. Over 80 years ago, a man rose to power by claiming he would make Germany great again, and that Jews were the root of everything wrong in the country. When people ask why Germans would follow and support such a man, well, this is your…

Thank you! Every time I point this out, I’m worried that what I say may also sound racist. Your wordage sounds better.

This is what Jade Helm was preparing us for people!

Born and raised, at least 6th generation, in a red district. Guess who I voted for? I have never once voted for Cruz, and I’ve been registered in this district since 2000.

Money laundering. ...only Trump didn’t want to use his own money, or even do the work himself by visiting. Smart though. It’s cheap, lazy, and no way to trace it since he wasn’t the one doing it. Winning.

Godwin’s Law

As a native Texan, I’ll probably be hung for telling you this, but when I drink Dr Pepper, even just a little, I feel full, but still empty. DP Zero is more worse at this, and Diet Dr Pepper is the absolute worst of this fullness/emptiness feeling. I hate diet drinks in general, but if I simply must drink one, DP’s…

“You drink it hot?”

It’s like that women’s protest they did March 8th 2017. Wear red and don’t buy anything. I wore red, and so did my daughters preschool teacher. I thought it was so cool that this elderly woman knew. But her helper, and everyone else that day who eventually learned about the movement that day were all like “I wished I…

Sounds like you’ve never been turned away because the electronic voting booths, which were supposed to make things simpler, weren’t working that day. Or was turned away because when you changed your address on your license, it didn’t prompt you to update your voter registration. Or had to endure a tropical storm and…

“A black teen in Texas was expelled for refusing to stand for the Pledge of Allegiance. The Texas attorney general is siding with the school board, because we live in hell”

I love this scene. But what always confused me was Texas’ heat index. It could be 95 degrees in Arlen, but still feel like 111.