...Women Over 30 Are Having More Babies Than Younger Women

maybe you’ll find this as hilarious as i do 

Awwwwww. My big, tall teenage son loved Frog and Toad when he was a toddler. :)

Really fantastic selection this year! Sometimes a few of them are obviously urban legends, but these are all great. Now I have the shivers. It’s a good, warm feeling.

I was putting my toddler to bed tonight (after reading these during her nap earlier today) and she stopped what she was doing and turned her attention to something behind me and I thought, “oh shit” and then she said, “Ooooh the moon!” because her white noise machine projects a night sky onto her ceiling. I breathed a…

creepy. keep us posted...

What the fuck is gonna happen. Like, how fucking close do we have to cut it? When will women matter even a fucking little? Do these douche bags know we carry them for ten months and then birth them and nurse them and change dirty diapers and hold them and love them just to have them grow into fucking rapists who strip…

In my mind I heard this in the voice of Princess Carolyn from Bojack Horseman and it made a good thing even better ;-).

My husband found this very funny. He asks how you keep a straight face when you hear such ludicrous things.

When she gets older still, you can tell her about how she was the OG Jez baby! She already has a comment section full of ethereal AuntyUncles.

I miss her rosy cheeks.

I refused to let my four year old watch any more TV today and he told me to go to jail. Kids are a trip. Haha

My three and a half year old alternately tells me I’m her favorite mommy ever (pretty sure she’s never had another one lol) and “go away and leave me alone forever” as she slams the door on me. You are not alone- small children are adorable, amazing, and insane jerks. 

Thank you.

Que?

You think that’s rough? I’m about to have to quit my job because apparently everyone decided to start chopping up onions in hallway.

How absolutely decent, and awesome of everyone involved.

PAPA JOHN believes that this right here was ok & acceptable... “that where he grew up people used to kill black people by dragging them behind trucks.”

My first reaction to this was, what a lovely moment for mothers everywhere. I don’t think she was trying to glamorize her child as an accessory - do you really believe that was what this moment was about for her? Yes it made headlines, the kind headlines I like to see more of. I’m sort of astounded at Jezebel’s…