Allow me to summarize it: Fuck all the poor people who be trying to get at your cheddar.

That Coach of the Year trophy looks suspiciously like my Uncle Ronny sitting on the park bench at 3:34 every day as he waits for the Washington HS girl's cross country team to jog by on their daily practice run.

This video is free and it's all the Cage I need.

Except they lost to Denver, Golden State, and Memphis. It's hard to imagine a conspiracy in favor of those teams.

A gentleman never tells.

I met Ryan Mallett once, he didn't seem like a drug addict. Until he tried to resell me some burgers from Burger King. Then he offered to suck my dick.

That wasn't a ham, it was a log of Rashaan Salami.

Yes but did you see that ham and cheese sandwich? It could jump out of a fucking pool! That's totally relevant to football.

Thank you for serving our country. As a reward, here's an asshole to shake your hand.

How cheap, I much prefer to make jokes relating fisherman's wharf and Alex Smith's odiferous vagina.

+1

I would like to read stuff by the wonderfully dyspeptic Lipsyte, but I'm already attending Tom Cruise's wonderfully dyslexic reading of The Wrath of Grapes.

Craggsgasm.

They do when I'm being pedantic.

KOALA'S ARE NOT BEARS! GOOD DAY!

How much for a painting of just Lisa Hillary and the horse?

Or they could paint him as Rocinante, since he's a jackass who thinks he's a stallion.

Cicero has always been a disgrace and a traitor.

/cums