Bulgogi is always worth the impending intestinal discomfort.

I'd enjoy the imaginary branch of my family more if they weren't so negative.

I'm not a particularly large Zeppelin fan, but that cover the NBA has Nicole Scherzinger do for their promos is a musical abortion.

Then he put on some John Denver and wept for the scent of couches burning in the street.

"The calls are correct. There are nein problems with the officiating."

Sources say his father is an investment banker and still waiting for him to get his shit together.

Has anyone else noticed the resemblance between Jeff Foster and the evil surgeon from The Human Centipede?

I know. In other news, HIBBERT USES TWO PIVOT FEET ON EVERY FUCKING PLAY.

The Bulls effort is piss poor. Giving up offensive rebounds, not getting out on pick and pop, lazy passes. Thibs better be throwing things in the locker room.

Brandon Marshall has always had problems with Cutler-y.

Sucks to be you, Herpes Face.

You know who else slapped a Zsa Zsa for being a mouthy bitch? Robert Evans.

I discussed this with a friend and we decided an iPhone version of Infinite Jest would run at least 10,000 iPhone pages.

My sister quit brown, but it was less because of the incessant teasing and more because dad told her she was gonna be out of the will.

+1

(Redacted)

Used to be that the borderline ruffians were accusing the Jayhawkers of stealing their property. Funny how times change.

I was far too drunk to use a computer.

I miss those. Instead I get the NBA Network's garbage.

My guess would be don't-forget-where-you-came-from-cheese mac. I have no idea why or reason to support this.