Oh, this is easy.

Why can’t they just give us an anaesthetic and put us in a sarcophagus room for 12 hours?

Lol, zero sympathy for this guy. The “Work Harder” writing under the wing is all I need to know to have a good idea of what this individual is like. 

Collin, how is this so hard to get through to the Jalopnik staff? Cars don’t target anyone.

If your response to an article about someone in a car assaulting a cyclist in a bike lane is some bloo bloo bloo about bikes in the traffic lane (where they are allowed by law in almost everywhere!) you should get your head checked because something is clearly wrong with you.

If only drivers were as law abiding as you think...

That is the correct way to make a bike lane.

Wouldn’t it be more accurate if the title of the article was “Bay Area Criminals Assaulting Cyclists with Car Doors”

I wish assholes like this would be hunted down and chemically castrated. 

As a rental these were among my favorites for many years. Then again I didn't have to own the thing.

I had a 2006 Civic SI brand new and drove it nearly 120k miles. I then had an e39 m5, an f80 m3, and a 997 turbo 6mt.

I rent A LOT of cars. A few years ago I was headed to a conference in Banff. When I went to pick up my rental car the day before heading west to Banff, the agency owner asked me “Where to this time?”

One time, late on a Wednesday night after the track setup had been completed, I drove the Monaco Grand Prix circuit in a rental Citroen C1. Having a slow car (with a manual) meant I could pretty much go all-out without technically doing anything illegal, and this is without question the most fun I’ve ever had in a…

Fun fact, that woman is the directors (the Zucker bros) mother!

As someone who does heavy commercial aircraft maintenance for a living, I have no idea how this thing made it out of the hangar with the flight controls in this condition. Not only do we do hundreds of ops checks before the plane leaves, but the pilots typically exercise all flight controls and brakes before they take…

Bonus points if Clippy popped up on the infotainment screen to tell you this...

Dude, this is Ford. More like this:

Or, if they’ve driven through a number of crosswalks that are in use, it might recommend a Mustang. 

While driving an Escape:

They should have a function where the screen blinks at you if you haven’t put anything of substantial weight in the bed for some time: