@kevipants!: you'd think.

I kinda wish it would've crushed the van, to teach a lesson to the lucky asshat that parked illegally.

@Billiam_Bisquits: rofl. Sounds like Indian Jones badge is called for.

@Billiam_Bisquits: rofl. Sounds like Indian Jones badge is called for.

I just became the mayor of your mom.

well, that didn't seem to work. Here's different example:

I was waiting for them to make a Newton's Cradle with all of those extra balls.

wow. If an accurate representation of the results, that's mind-bogglingly good news for future burn victims.

Even the zombies have the good sense to stay inside.

NH drivers: attention whores.

@Wolfstone is informative: ah! Well, in that case, I have some cave-aged laundry I've been neglecting to fold.

whatever the last one off the line (regardless of make/model) was before Jalopnik decided to turn their site into the internet equivalent of a Chrysler 300 wearing Bentley badges.

this kinda reduces the panache of "cave-aged" cheeses.

So Charlie Sheen is a fluffer for female porn stars?

Nielsen ratings = sham. It's not that his hasn't always been the case, it's just more apparent now.

Paging Mr. Holmes?... Mr. John Holmes? Please pick up a white courtesy phone, you have a call from a Mr. Jeremy.

@jakebonz: I was thinking the same thing.

@pj134: moose smoothies, anyone?

@Dolly Time: D'oh! you beat me to it.

@scokar: I REALLY liked that book. Can't wait for the next one.