That's what you get when you have the intern staff at Bleacher Report design your hoodies.

@ClueHeywood: You forgot to add: scanning stories on Deadspin (o.5); reading latest Favre story (o.5); drafting witty comment regarding the size of Favre's penis, or lack thereof (0.3); re-reading, editing comment (0.3); refreshing page for replies (o.4).

@ToddReesingsTurfFacial: Fuck contrition. I stand by what I said in that dipshit's article.

@Phintastic: I committed the Tri-Force of ninja-baiting: comment-bombed HuffyPo, picked a fight with an old-timer and posted aa long, unfunny diatribe on the Armstrong thread. It's all good - now I'll get to know via promotion if my shit's any good for real.

@The nutshot heard round the world: Do keep in mind that their MO is to bait someone into a fight and then sue. I've been with LGBT counter-protests, and they always taught us to keep our distance, make no physical contact, etc.

@Clinton Portishead: Late to this, but sorry about your loss man. Been there before, it sucks.

@Hatey McLife: Ack, looks like I crapped on DUAN with that back to the minors post. It wasn't meant to be an obsession over the star, but rather a call to produce quality comments regardless of one's status, and that losing it should be a motivator to do better.

@ursa: Good to know, thanks.

To me, the pizza order just ties it together. And she Marshawn Lynch'd that poor kid to get the seat. It was impressive.

@Achiever: Fuck, you too?

@WhynotstartYunieveryday: I'd be down, what dates?

@Bobby Ostrich: Take the meds. Steal/delete his porn and replace it with lemon parties. Deny everything when he asks. Just off the top of my head ideas.

@Body By Bacardi: I got whacked by posting a long, unfunny comment in the Armstrong thread. I usually do that for Craggs' stuff, but I really haven't been on this year so maybe they just wanted to give me a kick in the ass.

Train DUAN,

Sent Back to the Minors D!UAN

@Same Sad Echo: I'm sure Cohen felt the same way for Butler last year...nah, he just wanted the plebeians to get stomped.

@GaybrahamLincoln: My partner technically is, so I can do that. I guess I was confused because when I last got a computer, that shit was already on there and loaded. Oh well. 'Nother $100 down the drain.

@Same Sad Echo: I'm sure you can cry over all of those other Final Four appearances and National Championships. My school will never be in that position again.

@OnTheTwelfthNightOfLloydChrist...: Holy shit, I literally thought the same thing when it happened to me. A bunch of us got tagged so we'll be in this together.

Stupid Tech D!UAN