If Harry Morton's father marries Rumer and they have a baby, and Demi marries Harry Morton, Demi would be her own grandmother.

Demi Moore is dating the father of her ex-boyfriend Harry Morton; also, Harry Morton dated her daughter Rumer Willis in 2007.

My favorite: I got a "Hiya, toots!" while crossing the street in front of a truck driver. I felt like I was in 1930s movie.

Always assume they don't.

Well, fuck that person and their ugly soul. I feel pity for them that they have to live with themselves for the rest of their lives.

UGH SHE IS THE BEST. She and Samira Wiley need their own show where they just mock white people for a half an hour.

“Yeah, they’re privileged. But they’ve earned it.”

Destroyed? I'm sorry, did roving bands of angry feminists come through and burn Steubenville to the ground, salting the earth on the way out? Nope! Two boys were put on trial, convicted, and sentenced. Adults were told to take responsibility for their role in what happened. As for Christmas day death threats, that is…

My fiend are all kind of adult, too, Gwyneth. That's why they're drunk.

GOOP is probably her initials - Gwyneth Olivia Ostentatious Paltrow, or whatever...

As I proceeded down that list, Head!Gwneyth started to sound — LIT-RILLY — like Rob Lowe's character on Parks & Rec. The alt-universe version who name drops political dignitaries and rare wine vintages that don't actually exist in between crunches.

Taye Diggs, always and forever. Yum yum.

Russell Brand is pretty awesome, until he divorces you over text message.

I like to imagine all these Paltrow-isms being said by Tobias Funke. Try it, it's fun.

I just watched this while sitting on the couch wearing yoga pants and eating a frozen pizza.

You have nailed it. I don't even understand what she's trying to do. I'm always find myself thinking, "You're pretty, talented, wealthy, married to a talented and attractive man, have lovely children, access to just about anything you want...why do you seem so frantic and desperate to make us believe you're as…

I always wait for these on a GOOPy post. thank you! they always make me snort giggle. she's like an F Scott Fitzgerald character.

It's been awhile since I've done this, so here goes.

This, in my opinion, is the BEST show on TV right now. I laugh until I cry. I hate Family Guy, but I LOVE them. Louise is my hero, but I love all of them. I also recently read (but am too lazy to look for the link), that it is also the most sexually accepting show on TV.

Why does someone who has had everything so easy in her life still try so hard? It's really disquieting how focused she is on creating an image, but I honestly don't even know who her target audience is.