The whole Howard family was really excited by the Venice canal

I've been proselytizing for King of Kong since my brother told me about it. The USA tie thing is my favorite, but a close second is when he compares the controversy surrounding the statements he makes to the abortion issue. Wow. He's just such a perfect movie villain that I'm amazed he exists in real life.

You all think this octagon girl got hired because she has a cute exterior. For shame. She's 3 times as rad as you think... on the inside.

As a testament to his character, even Jeff's worst enemy described him as Terrific, Radiant, and Humble.

Many girls were upset at the impossible standards Coach Meat set, offering only moderate praise for a .667 batting average.

And to think, just 8 years have passed since Steve Phillips was fired for his acceptance of a 'Mo Vaughn.

Salieri's place among composing greats remained secure until he was Murray'd in 1984.

His entire life spent attracting the attention of babies and the mentally disabled for even the simplest of movements, Keys finally snapped.

Judges initially rated the catch a 5, thought about it, relented, and gave it a 6.

Offering little solace to the fans, the less talented team Joaquin Plate remains in the first division.

Not pictured: A wistful Cooper Manning sporting a brand new jersey, cleats, and helmet in a Modell's fitting room, his mall security uniform hanging just out of view.

Streaking in the rain? He must have been Friesian.

Kris must have been getting his stats from the Pyongyang Times where pre-Kim to with-Kim stats promised him instant improvement to 100% shooting accuracy and a 60" vertical. No mention of any post-Kim era serves to reason he'll retire as Eternal MVP.

Canseco now uses Gaga's pledges of love, support, and acceptance to her "Little Monsters" as inspiration for his daily bathroom address to his testicles.

Wow.

Gary Is Gone

NICE

Thurman later found out his unfortunate sickness could have been avoided if only he'd laid off all the red meat, refined sugar, and

I'm so disgusted I can't even finish Medina.

And why did he do this? Not for his own skin