"She will not come out of this hell. She's mine. Anyone who prays for her will die."

I hate the filter used on Lana del Rey's video. That is all.

Isn't there something to when your best friends go through a divorce, you're more likely too as well? So this is really Gwyneth's fault.

I want to see her on Celebrity Rehab! (Is that show still on?)

You are allowed to like anything you want!

From the Purple Rain premier:

He's brought several lawsuits against me for having "Raspberry Beret" stuck in my head without his permission.

Yes. Celebrate. Just don't post any of your celebrations on YouTube or elsewhere.

Tish's mom reminds me exactly of Lydia's mom on The Only Way is Essex. Oh what, I'm the only one that got pulled into that 12 season bullshitery?

"We also have to make sure that we learn as much as we can," Smith says, "about elements of provocation."

Yes. This is the exact same thing.

If you don't bring home cheesy poofs from the grocery store when you've been asked to, it's at least somewhat on you.

I hope you live alone

"That house is over 400 yards away!"

Smith: [Says it's the victim's responsibility to avoid a beating]

Look at what we were wearing, though. We were virtually asking for it!

"the elements of provocation" - that is the shittiest, grossest kind of bullshit.

Who provoked ESPN into forcing First Take on us?

Isn't this the same thing as saying "women...if you don't want to get raped don't dress slutty? If you dress slutty and you get raped, it's partially your fault..."

Stephen A is like that itch you get right between your nuts and ass, during a meeting with the CEO of your company and investors.