Man, for animals we like partially for their intelligence, dogs are incredibly stupid.

So, honest question: will you actually come back and admit that you got two black people mixed up and casually suggested that an innocent person committed domestic violence because you were SO MAD that Deadspin isn’t ignoring Mayweather’s shittiness, or will you just seethe and hope no one notices?

I didn’t expect him to be THRILLED but his reaction was way over the top, right?!

I agree with you and thank you for putting this more eloquently than I could have. My GTF over it. Parents are adult human beings with their own complex inner lives. They are there to protect and ease you into adulthood, not be your emotional slave. I lost my father three years ago, so I have real experience here.…

This was kind of embarrassing to read. This kind of (over)reaction I would expect from a teenager, but from someone in their late 20s it’s just awkward. Your mom is an adult, who made many sacrifices for your happiness, and when she tries to reconcile some joy back into her life you say terrible shit and act petulant…

YES! I still remember how hard I laughed at that “Background Guy” sketch!

OK Borat.

OK Borat.

Isn't commission paid as a percentage of the contract earned? I seriously doubt any new contract he gets would equal the $15 million a year he's currently scheduled to make.

Who the fuck is surprised that a woman named Eileen would only fill out the first leg?

Sorry for the fake Rap.

Antonio Cromartie: Sorry about the fake wrap.

My god. If I worked Michael Sam into the punch line would you have got it then?

"Chip Kelly makes decisions over the last couple of years," Smith said today, "That, dare I say, leave a few brothers feeling uncomfortable."

I don't think you need to be calling parents, "idiots." There's a big difference between being an aunt/uncle and being a parent. If you are not a parent, you really have no idea. Just because you tried that once with your nephew and it worked with him in that instance doesn't mean it will work with every other kid in…

Sure was lucky that someone had crashed their car into the rink so we could get this on video.

Woody Allen definitely, Roman Polanski maybe, Bill Cosby almost definitely not.

"Character is what you show when no one is looking"

Jeff Ireland: Dez, are you ashamed of your grammar?

My wife died last year at age 35. (Bear with me, totally not trolling for sympathy.)

Don't worry about their psyches. Worry that they all have measles now.