Hot Beef Sundae sounds like a dirty sexual act, not an actual food. "Did you give her the Dirty Sanchez, Carl?" "Nope, I gave her a Hot Beef Sundae"

Ibérico de Bellota makes serrano seem like pressed ham lunch-meat.

Nothing starting with "Shady" could ever be good.

I hadn't seen any and then I kept reading. Gross.

I don't shop at Walmart. I would rather pay a little more to someone who pays their employees enough to eat.

NO. And Fuck No. They are doing this by undercutting their employees and continuing to outsource the way that they acquire their products. They do not get my business, and the organic food lovers better not jump on board the Walmart train to hell. Seriously. NO.

"I will never let my darling have processed foods, and we will frolic in the fresh airy meadows for six hours each day, and read classic children's stories for an hour each evening" said pregnant-me. Toddler-mom-me says, "Hot dog bread is totally a thing, here play with mama's phone while she finds the corkscrew."

this is a man who is working to stop me from getting married and paid for commercials that imply I'm a pedophile. That sounds like someone who is out to get me. The work he did isn't just a political dispute, it's a direct attack on me. Why would I tolerate it? It's like saying I should tolerate a punch in the face.

I love how conservatives think private companies should be forced to keep employing someone when they hate the right people.

EAT SHIT AND DIE!

"However, I do want to have shiny skin and be vaguely pissed off at something in the distance."

I've witnessed hiring decisions for humanities jobs and it rarely comes down to a consensus on a "superior" candidate. There is such a glut of good candidates out there that colleges might end up with 2 or 3 final picks with equal qualifications. And there are fights in the department all the time about which to…

I would pay 11 cents to make them shut up.

They need to mix banana split with peanut butter fudge. And then I will get excited.

This is how you know there was a fix.

People who are going to fight against abortion access will find ammunition anywhere. If situations like this did not exist, they would find their gun powder elsewhere.

He's also her figure-skating coach! He is SO multi-talented!

This is obviously a nuanced topic, but here's my take -

The first rule of the "Sleeps Through the Night Club":

DON'T TALK ABOUT THE SLEEPS THROUGH THE NIGHT CLUB!!!!!!!!!

Picture it pussycat—New York, 2011. Yours truly is recovering from a c-section and the best advice she gets in regard to her recovery is be active. Because of the c-section, using the infant carrier was not yet advised if it could be avoided (it would sometimes rub against the scar). Moreover, my child slept in 2 hour…