My first marriage ended in divorce after ten years together and four married. I definitely felt like a failure at first. I feel like there is still an attitude that divorce is this horrible, taboo thing, which i really do not get. I remember once shortly after we split up being with a group of people I didn't know and…

Where would you get to travel to?

I love the cello! You are making me want to go out and get lessons and learn the Bach cello suites! When I was younger I tried to take a few cello lessons, but I didn't have time to keep it up. I say, as long as you aren't expecting to become the next Yo-Yo Ma, who cares how good or bad you are at it, as long as you…

I have a friend who subscribes to the "everything here sucks a little" theory. You found an affordable apartment in a neighborhood you like? It's the size of a walk-in closet in another city. Etc. No reason to stay if all that bad stuff isn't balanced by the good— which it definitely sounds like it's not for you!

Yeah, I feel the same as you. I think it is so different for natives. It's like growing up in a dysfunctional household— you don't even think about the fact that you are putting up with a bunch of crap you don't have to because it seems normal to you. Even the dirtiness thing— I was watching the opening credits of a…

I did it for three years with my now-husband while I was working in a different part of the country. I would advise against it unless you all had already decided that you were in it for the long haul (marriage or the equivalent); i.e., that decision probably shouldn't be prompted by your current situation. And if one…

I agree that you should break up with him. Regardless of this most recent blow-up (which frankly sounds like it has made the whole situation totally untenable), he had a relationship that you were uncomfortable with, he didn't want to change it (his right) and you continued to be uncomfortable with it. On some level…

We did this for three years while I worked in a different state. We talked every evening— sometimes it would just be for a few minutes— and visited twice a month. Fortunately the flights were cheap and we were able to take an amazing vacation using the miles we accumulated. We didn't have any kids then, which I am…

Definitely ask. How long have you been there? If you were just hired, could that have been a factor?

I said this in my other comment, but I would try to balance these two (love versus practicality). Yes, you need to earn money. But having a job you dislike and spending ~40 years doing it will steal your soul.

As a former college professor who as taught at both an Ivy League and a state university, I think what you are doing sounds incredibly smart. You will definitely get the most value for your money by staying local and public (?) for your undergrad and then going to one of the more expensive private schools for a…

I can understand why it's hard for you, and I am so sorry about your dad. But there isn't really anything to say or do now— the baby is named and they're not going to change it. They probably think of it as honoring your dad, and therefore not something that would require a warning. I've never heard of parents…

It would be great if some random third person was just like, "you sound like a nutjob lol". She needs to get told, but unfortunately you are probably right not to engage.

Yes, absolutely. I feel that way especially about the food. I used to get some specific requests about food that could be annoying, but it makes perfect sense that they would want to have some control over what they are putting in their bodies when they are on the road all the time. I hate when I'm traveling and my…

Yeah, if our tech director had been made to pick out the bad color M&Ms from a bowl, that would have been his last day working there. These are union guys, they know their worth and don't suffer fools. :)

Been there, done that (for much more low-key artists), not as much fun as it sounds. Definitely better than an office job, though, you're right!

Holy crap, that's horrible. It sounds like a common accident, actually, so I shouldn't have used the word stupid. I've been careless too and I don't consider myself stupid either, :)

This is what I always hear, but it doesn't make sense to me. When I worked in a concert hall, I took care of backstage requests and passed off the technical stuff to the stage hands. It's very possible that I could have missed something while they were on top of their game, or vice versa (well, no, because they were…

Honestly, our bodies are barely big enough. When I was pregnant my husband and I watched some documentary about babies and one of the tidbits in there was how the baby has to turn during the birthing process because its enormous head barely fits through our birth canal or whatever. So if you are very small and your…

I thought the advice to the childless friend was a quite moving take on being a new mom. (Ok, I might have teared up, but this is my only chance to have a little wine today and I haven't eaten since lunch, ok?!) I am so grateful that people in my life have been offering to come by since the baby came, and I know that…