I'm guessing this is a source of a lot of misunderstandings among commenters here. When people inevitably say "SAHMs who get divorced face financial peril!" I feel like, "Girl, I got that info with my mother's milk, you don't think I'm smart enough to protect myself?" But for someone who's coming from a different…

I'm really talking about the circles we run in; this will be his world during his formative years. I only know two other SAHPs; one is a woman and one is a man. Both of his grandmas work, all of his aunts work. All of my close female friends work, including the one with a special needs toddler. These women have all…

In that last one I thought maybe, since she was performing, she might have been taking a deep breath in through her nose, which would cause it to appear different. Plus, whatever.

Wow, that is so sad. What a difficult and interesting job that must be!

Good to know! A French friend gave us some when our kid was born and we were confused, but in the craziness we forgot to ask her about it.

"Money doesn't make your relationship equal, and if you think it does then you need to take a long hard look at your relationship."

But isn't that pretty much true of any interpersonal relationship? I mean, I was married before and working full-time. My ex-husband worked for part of that time, then was unemployed, then went back to school. Regardless of his employment status, he never did his fair share around the house. I ended up doing…

This is a really important point and something concrete that actually would help families if it were fixed— as opposed to the commenters here who are just denigrating SAHMs. Ironically, my husband is in a female-dominated field that requires no specialized education to get into and I'm in a male-dominated field that…

This raises an interesting point, which is that this is a culturally diverse group of people here, and where you are coming from makes a big difference. If I was coming from where you are, I would probably feel like denigrating SAHMs just balances out the prevailing message. But where I'm from (probably a combination…

So a woman who pays someone else (who often happens to be a woman of color) what usually is a low wage to watch her kids so she can, I dunno, sell houses or have a shop or make money for one of the big banks is moving women forward socially and/or politically, but a woman who takes a few years out of her career to do…

Your Irish mammies things adds nothing whatsoever to this discussion. It seems very common around here to assume that SAHMs have no professional accomplishments and networks of their own, no financial security that they earned themselves, and no means of supporting themselves without their husbands. You do realize…

This is a very nice response! Some thoughts, not necessarily disagreements: before a child is school-aged, someone has to devote the hours equivalent to a full-time job raising him/her. I think it is perfectly acceptable to say "I believe that I am better equipped to raise my young child than a nanny or day-care…

Just wanted to say thank you very everything you've said, and I am so glad to see that there are other like-minded feminists out there. My son will grow up seeing a mutually respectful, equal relationship between his parents regardless of where the money is coming from. That is loads better than what is the status quo…

You participate in a religion that, in its most common incarnations, "does nothing to promote their fellow women", "reinforces practices we've been fighting against for decades", and is not at all egalitarian, but you believe the way you do it is in line with your feminist values and does not detract from your…

Thank you! :)

Just so you know, your language in your initial response in this thread, especially the use of "we" makes it sound like you do believe yourself to be speaking for feminists in general.

Some people, both fathers and mothers, want to take care of their children full time— it's not about it being necessary, it's about it being desirable for some.

I really think you are coming at this from the wrong direction. The problem isn't that women have no choice but to be SAHMs— that hasn't been the reality for most American women for a long time. The problem is that work traditionally done by women is denigrated and devalued (your attitude here is contributing to that,…

Also, wouldn't this make her more of a feminist than the vast majority of women ever, including probably everyone in this discussion? I am done being offended because that is seriously crazy, like I must have gone through the looking glass here.

Does her situation make her a good enough feminist for you?