My wife's family, who may or may not be hill people, refer to a salivating dog as "licking its chomps." Which I love, so now I am trying to spread the word.

If that's the case then you better really relax, is all I'm saying.

"Syracuse Orangemen? Pretty insensitive to John Boehner, if you ask me."

This is a phenomenal costume, and I may be dressing up as this tonight.

"Fresh" is maybe an overstatement when the name change is to a name that has been in the league for all but one of the last 26 seasons. But it was an exciting game!

Peyton doesn't take selfies, Tom Brady doesn't take selfies … WINNERS DO NOT TAKE SELFIES.

It's a subtle distinction, but I believe you're thinking of "getting postered." Or, is that when someone hits you with a rolled-up poster? Shit, now I'm confused.

I'm more of a Wichita State fan.

That's not an arm.

Why are you even writing about this, don't you know the Lakers had a game yesterday and were really terrible!?

That is a strong tweet, and he should stand behind it.

This made me laugh out loud, wonder why I had laughed out loud, then think oh shit, maybe I am a terrible person because it could be about child abuse or something and why wasn't THAT my first response. Within about 20 seconds. Good times!

Why is this even a sports blog? We're getting into the thick of bulb-planting season, and also folks need to know about the Autumn foliage forecasts.

That's just a picture of his hands - they are much bigger in real life. It's a common mistake.

That's Tommy "Tom" Tomlinson. But you can call him Tommy.

In recent years I've been following this advice, but when I was much younger I slept with some under-20 women. I hope my prostate wasn't permanently harmed by it.

Hmm. I'm 1/16 hoodish, and have a double major in literature and hoodish american studies, and I'd read it as "Well, sir, quite a few people must appreciate both the quality and the entertainment value of the work I do because I get paid a very handsome wage."

The coup de grace came when McGee waited for the heckler to fall asleep, then gently shaqted a $100 bill behind his ear.

You seem to know a lot about words and how they work. Are you a professional football coach by any chance?

I thought they just hired Gus Frerotte as celebrations coach. If so, this performance is pretty disappointing.