@Breamworthy: Me too, friend. Me too. It tells you that far too much of my "work time" is actually "Jezebel time."

@dancingspring: Or, we will have resolved everything. TODAY WE ARE ALL TEAM CHEESECAKE!

Who would these fine ladies, and honorary Jezebels, vote for? I think we all know...

@the glamwich: Give it.

Ice cream cake vs. Red velvet?!!? How is one supposed to make such a decision?! HOW DESSERT GODS, HOW?!

Is that what we're doing today? For April Fool's? Printing old news and watching the commenters get super confused and lose our minds? Because the hemorrhoid post and now this, I think I see what you're doing there Jez.

@Sputnik_Sweetheart: and she looked so thin! I just don't understand.

@Grim Reaper of the Forest: If God didn't want us to put puppies in clothes, then why did he make them so damn adorable? Hmm?

@IBleedGlitter: The High Priestess of Tinsel: LOGIC!

@randomnessish: Pretty Pretty Princess? Because I loved that shit.

@NellMood: Unless they've seen The Little Mermaid a thousand times like I have. Then they would just sing you a song.

@BAngieB: I was just thinking about that. Oh, dear, Jezebel godesses, never pretend to sell yourselves to Conde Nast again.

@girlscoutcookie deserves her orgasms, dammit: Go to PF Chang's and get a flourless chocolate dome. It probably has 8000000 calories in it, but it is delicious.

@lilyHaze: So, basically, you are on Team Cream Cheese. A delicious choice, indeed.

@the glamwich: I love you for the food porn that you've provided us throughout the course of this battle. God, I want some key lime pie now.

I will probably never voice a Disney character. This has been my dream since childhood. Considering that I am 25 years old and that they pretty much only use celebrities to do the voices now, I should probably let go of it. ::Sigh::

@AnotherJenn: I find this solution oddly and frugally brilliant.

I will go home and watch the first act of Gypsy in memorium.

@quitelikely: Seriously. How is this so much better than the original? Love it!

I mean, really. Did he actually think that he could get away with this, and that the specifics of his spending would never be revealed? In this day and age?! Politicians are idiots. If you do something scandalous or illegal, we will eventually find out. And it will get turned into a full-blown scandal. Because 24 hour…