I'm staying in the cave folks, don't ever want to leave.

No way, bro! Next you're gonna tell me that toil and trouble was from Macbeth!

Of all of them, that's the one you pick up on? A fellow Nittany Lion!

"Girl, you must be a Rembrandt painting the way you're asking for a pearl necklace."

"Hey girl, you make me feel like I'm back in my college Poe seminar, the way I don't pay attention when you say nevermore."

"Girl, you must be from West Egg 'cause all I'm getting from you is the green light."

"Hey girl, is your name Aristotle? 'Cause I don't think I ever want to leave your cave."

"How 'bout you be my puppy and I'll be your Lennie?"

"Hey girl, you must be Ophelia 'cause you've got me wanting to toil and trouble all night long."

Donaghy swears he could have not fought Crawford if he was really trying. He only threw the left hook because he was in debt to the mob.

Ronaldo: This one's mine. Sets up perfectly for me from the right side.

I get that there's always going to be suspicion, after this guy's coming off a great year for him and the franchise. But at the same time, you can't be caught with illegal drugs and expect to face absolutely zero consequences from the League.

This is a really great recipe, Albert, but I make a few changes when I make it. First, I use avocados instead of chickpeas, and then I also make guacamole instead of hummus.

Holy shit, Drew. You're white?!?

+1

Costa is excited to bring her renowned 3.08-3.08-1.54 formation to Clermont.

Williams: [singing] Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there! With a healthy pitching staff!

What kind of sick, twisted motherfucker would do something like this? Literally could have picked any other town to rent in.

I'm just surprised there wasn't any horrifically offensive language against gays or minorities in the placeholder text.

Well this is just one more thing — in addition to corrupting America's youth and screwing middle-aged men — that Goodell shares with Sarah Silverman.