If you watch the video of his release where he purposely slams the door open to waiting reporters (something you don’t see much in U.S. coverage where they talk over the sound, so it largely went unnoticed) you can see he learned nothing in jail and expresses not one iota of remorse. Just in that one action, you can…

He’s a white woman without a college degree. He’ll be fine.

I will see your Ocasio-Cortez and raise you one Jason Spencer.

Now we know he actually meant to say, “Grab em by the covfefe.”

Thank you. Definitely a term I will probably need to know when the Trump trial gets underway.

Forgive me as I’m quite elderly by Jezebel standards and do not know or care about this individual who appears at first blush to be a talentless degenerate with a good marketing machine, but I really only read this newsletter expecting an explanation for how “FEFE” is short for COVFEFE, and was disappointed. Thank you.

This movie really needed to be a Disney ride first.

Maybe her Twitter break will give her an opportunity to cultivate a source that isn’t Javanka or someone in the Trump administration

I remember when that was the wackiest conspiracy theory around (and one I have always subscribed to). But new world, new day. Now we have a Russian agent in the WH, the entire Republican party compromised by a Kremlin-funded NRA, Nazis marching in the streets, and pedophiles running openly for Congress backed by…

She can’t just be a normal person and leave it at “this inspired me.” She has to turn it into some kind of royal proclamation. Fuck this cunt.

Any way he could be extradited to a country where he could be drawn and quartered? Purely hypothetical, of course, but mama needs her lullabies.

You’ll have to forgive her, ever since that little incident at the Red Hen, our special snowflake has been a little sensitive over the mention of anything rouge.

I know. Which Jonas is he?

I had a similar thought: a parade to rival the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade — a Festival of Trump Effigies — populated by Trump Baby Balloons (large and small) and other effigies (for those who want to get creative) that starts at his beloved, hideous Trump Tower and makes its way around to all the other Trump…

I think maybe a post-liposuction - sorry, “kidney embolism” – compression undergarment padded with cash in case of emergency defection.

She had a limited color palette for this trip.

She’s probably hiding something

Honestly, it was one of the better choices from the Lisa Frank belt collection

It’s not that no one will fuck Stephen Miller, it’s just that there is no suggestion that anyone would ever date him in the first place.

Nah. There are easier ways for Trump to get rid of his least favorite son (sorry everyone who voted for Eric, but you know it’s true). It’s a back up for his ZTE phone.