Fun fact: that boning produces these super cool eggs cases that you find emptied on the beach. They are usually referred to as either mermaid’s or devil’s purses. They are made of some crazy tough material.

They both seemed into it, which is pleasantly surprising, because that isn’t always the case in the animal world (I’m looking at you, ducks).

The worst part is, if the creepy dude had lived on the other side of the Delaware and they had sold their children into sex slavery across state lines, the sentence could have and would have been much worse (and Federal). Oh, but for a few miles.

Bucks County, for when you absolutely can’t make it down to Florida.

Right?? A few years ago we were briefly homeless due to a combination of huge medical debt and some questionable financial decisions. It was really fucking hard. We spent some time couch surfing and staying at shelters.

Amish - lots of inbreeding

I hear the distinct sounds of banjo music playing...

Well he was a self-proclaimed “prophet of God” so no harm done. Sentencing should be fairly light. If he were a “prophet of Allah” however...

It’s almost like religion treats women as chattel.

Three to seven years in prison for the parents!? THAT’S IT?!

TRUMP: And it was one of the most beautiful parades I have ever seen. And in fact, we should do one one day down Pennsylvania Ave.

The big difference is that both your grandpa and your kid will have learned more things a month from now.

Can we have Kinja be adapted to allow for awarding only once a day to only a single post more than one star? Please?

What does it say that even a scumbag like Sessions is doing the right thing and Trump not only doesn’t even understand why but only gets madder that Sessions isn’t showing him complete loyalty to the end? It’s truly like the mafia at this point.

Somewhere I heard that. Like, it was an illegal act done by the D.N.C., or the Democrats. That’s what I had heard. Now, I don’t know where I heard it, but I had heard that it had to do something with illegal acts with respect to the D.N.C. Now, you know, when you look at the kind of stuff that came out, that was, that…

Or,

It’s fascinating that he manages to remind me both of my 5-year old who sometimes can’t finish a thought and my 85-year old grandpa who is trying to learn a new hobby and show me everything he knows about it (not much).

TRUMP: Zero. So Jeff Sessions takes the job, gets into the job, recuses himself. I then have — which, frankly, I think is very unfair to the president. How do you take a job and then recuse yourself? If he would have recused himself before the job, I would have said, “Thanks, Jeff, but I can’t, you know, I’m not…

It’s a good thing that we can record Trump speaking, otherwise no one would ever believe that these are direct quotes from the president.

Trump could be the first teetotaler on an episode of Drunk History.