I ordered a meximelt last week! It rang up as a “cheesy roll-up” on the drive through menu but it was the same thing.

...

It just seems like he waits and waits and waits and waits, then makes one halfass attack that fails, every single time.

Excellent writeup, but no way Stoneface Quintana wins. He’s failed to deliver at the tour for *years.*

This is a terrible post. 

Folks who are cheering for VAR in the comments are complete dumbasses and should be fired into the sun.

If it’s not obvious enough to call in real time, play the fuck on.

One neat thing some people do is use grammar.

I hope someone rappels you in the mouth

Eric Devendorf was a guy.

Well said.

That’s a big no-no!

Favorite Solo Artist? Phil Collins

“Actually, I’m choosing to die upon this knoll, thank you”

Before you cry too hard, keep in mind that orcas deliberately target the calves of regular whales, hitting and harassing them for hours until they are too exhausted to swim anymore, then the orcas go in for the kill while the whale’s mother watches.

The second one is way better when you read it as Forrest Gump

I was prepared to be irate until seeing you saved Garbage Sons for last. Hands down the funniest, by far.

Runaway golf cart will always be the best. Way to botch your last post.

This is 100% accurate.

without the funereal prospect of having it stripped months later