Well the Cardinals can't really be too mad considering they all had Vaseline in their gloves last night as well

Wow, not only that great joke, but look at the lineup of commenters in that whole thread: Cheese-mac and Tulo's Mullet as pre-author commenters, Azure Texan, MKM, EMS, Bevraj, Hatey, DDJJW, IMG...

I was fully prepared to have weed.

I'm still shocked that no one has uncovered the fact that your REAL last name is Turkey Vulture.

Worst. Job. Ever. DUAN

I miss the NBA Shit list. You guys need to bring that back.

Have sympathy, Dwyane - they're just trying to take their talons to South Beach.

Now that the ball's square ...

He should have his mouth washed out with soap.

This is why hockey players miss out on the fun

I actually know one of the Texans' trainers and heard what happened. These three guys saw a homeless man out front of the hotel and were making fun of him. The guy had a sign asking for money and claiming that he had a bunch of illnesses, etc. Anyway, the problem apparently wasn't that they were mocking the poor…

"Okay, okay, I'll admit it— on review, that's not too shabby."

-Bill Belichick, picking through consignment store's Last Chance Sweatpants section

Meanwhile, Dexter has been charged with child endangerment for exposing these kids to shitty football and MRSA.

Are you fucking kidding me right now?

HEY YOU GOT IT WRONG! I OBJECT AND AM OFFENDED.

Look, it's not that easy to beat a two year old. Absolute Piece Of Human Fucking Garbage Academy is very selective.