“If he ever does want to do a figure skating game, I totally call dibs on making it,” he said.

There are no fucking words after that, none. He’s finished, done. I’ve heard some attempted defences of people over the course of the post-Weinstein saga but never anything so extraordinarily disregarding of what actually happened as this with Tarantino wanting to be a pedant about the legal definition of rape all of…

Maybe Belicheck hates Philadelphia so much that he wanted to see it destroyed.

I want her to divorce him while in office; cable news would go insane.

STOP THINKING, JUST REACT.

You’re right and I would give MSU four business days to get it fixed.

If the Miller family gets another bill after, say, this Friday, then bulldoze the MSU Sports Clinic.

Dr Jackson also served under Obama for both terms. There’s no indication he’s ever been dirty.

President Trump after your recently reported comments on Africa, are you concerned that the Black Panther movement is gaining traction in Wakanda?

Right Wing Nutters: “America is the greatest country in the world and fuck you if you don’t recognize and celebrate American Exceptionalism!”

9 days in and we have the comment of the year.

This picture looks like Incognito is forcing Sir Patrick Stewart to give him a blowjob.

You mean like how Southerners would describe the Civil War as “the Late Unpleasantness”?

Ump: Inside corner, strike three! You’re out!

Don’t worry, the Tallahassee PD investigated and said everything checked out.

Yeah, he plays football.

I’m not familiar with your American footed ball, but is there anything in this young man’s background that suggests emotional instability and poor impulse control?

Jesus. Does Lee here owe you money or something?

This is what happens when you eat too many Ls.

So he’s like Mark Sanchez but in reverse.

The staccato in her speech made each of those claps exist and not exist at the same time. Sharon Reed just invented Schrodinger’s Clapback and should be up for the Nobel Prize in Physics for that shit.