These seem like great all-ages birthday ideas. If I was turning 28 in July instead of March, I would seriously consider the piñata/bodypainting/waterfight plan.

No lie, I would wear the shit out of that print. I have a soft spot for floral prints of all kinds.

I dislike Scalia as much as the next thinking human, but unfortunately, that's not how SCOTUS works.

OMG 7 year old Bey is already such a queen. Love it.

At least a little bit. I know that's not a very scientific measurement but trust me: that's all it takes.

Do you have a blog? I would read the shit out of your blog.

Confirmed: Does not tasted like urine.

Commenting not because I give a shi* about the burner troll but because your screen name is amazing and we are power animal siblings. Thassall.

please tell me "drive your tractor to school day" was a real thing.

As Ms Minkoff does this professionally, I assume she's talking to higher-ups that aren't barred from talking to the media- PR reps, CEOs, COOs, etc. From a journalist's perspective, it's usually not useful to talk to subordinate employees for the kind of quote she's talking about- to elicit her sample quote above, you…

Gotcha. Thanks for enlightening.

I feel like there's a joke here I'm not getting.

Plus, up until the Eggs thing, it seemed like she was actually helping Tara, which is a fuck of a lot more than Sookie ever did for her supposed bff. That was the season where Tara smiled and relaxed and had a chance at a decent romantic relationship instead of hate-fucking everyone around her. Also, her wardrobe was…

I would often call cabs and wait for a really long time, or just crash where I was. My guy friends would either crash or walk for ages to get home. Of course, I was in Salt Lake City, so it wasn't as bad as it could be. There were cabs, though not many, and bus service doesn't stop at 6 (it stopped at 8!!)

That's so weird. I got my Mirena in UTAH and no one said squat. No, actually, scratch that- I explained (unprodded, because I was in nervous super-explainy mode) that I was going to grad school and didn't want to worry about getting knocked up. The doc and resident following her were like "yep, we both made the same…

For the first, I dunno, eight months I would get periods like the ones you describe every six weeks or so. I've had it for exactly a year now and I'll spot randomly, but by the time I get a pantyliner in there it's over. For some women they disappear entirely and for some they don't. I'm hoping mine do.

Everyone: "No, installation isn't that bad, really, it's fine."

Got the boobs and not the butt. I guess I'll blame the WASP side?

Which is really fucking unfortunate because the asshole is JEWISH and a. would probably rail against anyone applying similar stereotypes to him (as I would) and b. is NOT HELPING.

P.S. on behalf of all non-racist Jewish people I apologize.

That's a pretty adorable glance.