$10 on Salman Rushdie.

Cold, controlling, ambitious, obsessed with her "health," yet she CAN'T KEEP A MAN!!!!

The rumors surrounding Gretchen Mol's failed career makes my heart so sad.

Winona makes so much more sense in that part, tbh.

I'd buy it. She seems very much like the kind of person who says, "I just believe in making your own way in the world and not relying on hand-outs."

Now they're used primarily for walking to the mall and sulking.

EAT KALE AND SHOP IN PARIS, PEASANT.

Which of course would get blamed on her, because people are awful.

I've actually started to like Gwyneth recently, but I loooovvvveeeee dirt.

Or order pizza by the hand-width.

Right? What kind of bullshit.

My friend was in London for two days before he began adopting the cadence of an English accent (that kind of down-talking at the end of sentences). We wanted to slap him.

If anything, I'm extremely wary of fusing my life too completely to another person, because being from a "broken home" (God I hate that phrase), I know how utterly fucked things can get when they don't work out.

Though her feminism is questionable, Caitlin Moran's advice on dry cleaning is spot on:

Yes! Or even the upper room with all of the Medieval art. Don't just walk in, see David and walk out you fools!

Ooh, where in Florence? I was in Prato. It was awesome.

Or me and the Cardinal's favorite: "Oh, shit — once we have these $150 running shoes, we will finally be the athletes we never could be with $20 Walmart sneakers."

Well, it's good to know that my expiration date is coming up soon. I do feel like I've taken my foot of that pretentious gas pedal a little more lately, which is nice.

If anything, living in Europe makes it harder to get by without being that insufferable asshole who always says shit like, "Oh, when I lived in Tuscany..."

It's the kind of janky pastry you'd make if you were high as fuck?