You Owned Limbs Once.

Now you're playing with portals...

When I was in high school, I worked as a bag lugger/general bitch at a country club. One of the members one summer ceased to be a member the next, and because he was a generous tipper, I was moderately disappointed by this so I asked one of the guys he usually played with where he went. His story was that the guy…

WELL PLAYED, GINNIFER.

Your argument might be all well and good but you leave out this tidbit: the school wasn't looking for a student when they gave him a scholarship.

I'm sure he'd really miss attending classes, and be very sad about the degree he wasn't going to get anyway.

Right. I mean, why should a guy who's personally brought in millions of dollars in revenue be permitted to retain the remainder of his roughly $20,000 resident scholarship? That mooch.

You are amazing, and I would like to see your duck lamp.

I use Lattimore because he's an SC guy, but Tyrone Prothro's usually my go-to cautionary tale. Guy on the Heisman watchlist gets hurt, can't play again, and he's now a teller at a Tuscaloosa bank a couple blocks from the football facility. Saddest fucking thing in the world.

That Werthers trick is gold!
"I've got a whole pack of these you know. I've got nowhere to go and nothing to do. I can nonchalantly suck at these aaaaaalllll day...... Are you sure you can't go below $45?"

She just went up in my esteem, as GODDAMN I love to haggle at antique shops.

Good message to send! Where would we be if the whole country just decided to shu...

So you're telling me Kate's a Maxxinista?

I've never been antiquing, but haggling with crazed excuses sounds like I might give it a whirl!

Is "asked for a discount" just a euphemism for haggled, or are we to imagine she was like, 2000, hmm? And what is the rate for Princesses? ::wink::? Because I think haggling is standard in antiques shops (disclaimer: I have never been antiquing), but asking for a discount on account of being famous is gross.

Are non-standard deviations the one's that have to shave to make it look bigger? Asking for a friend.

Also, the Higgs Boson wasn't officially declared found until they reached five standard deviations.

A baseball player hitting 73 home runs in a season (2013 data, qualified batters).