@Little Time Bomb: We had the same problem at a high school where I used to teach. There was a very large evangelical church across the street, and the protestors would park there, and then camp out on the sidewalk in front of the school with their poster-size pictures of aborted fetuses.

And the envelope please...

@howdybeep (runs with monkey wrenches): No, no. Obviously deVere, Earl Oxford.

@flugennock: Dear lord, yes.

So "old spice" has to have been done early on right?

@BabyJane: I think it's a rose. How romantic?

@ZiggyStarPuff: Hearted, Ziggy. I had the same experience. And the overwhelming feeling of failure exacerbated my already severe postpartum depression.

@chatterboxwriting: Yes. It must have been very crowded.

Okay. So where does Scott Baio figure into this? I know he's in there somewhere.

Drugs. This is your wardrobe on drugs. Any questions?

@rodmanstreet: Hearted—my curly haired curvy sister!

This type of attitude about young women being responsible for tempering young men's lust is a common one in evangelical churches.

@feelingHELLAstabby: "You know, this is the same guy that thinks child support should be abolished for women who give birth while single. "

@TheFormerJuneBronson: Well that's a high bar you've set.

Oh one does, does one? Hmmm.

@MakeFetch: Agreed—I vote for Leans. Even though the effect is sort of the opposite.

@ShaynaLK: Yes. In fact, I only consider sports that involve pizza and beer and crazy shoes.

@katieupsidedown: Now, now. Don't go ruining the whole thing with common sense.

@Justine: I do! But I only wear them with Catholic schoolgirl skirts and pompom ponytails.

@staunchlymolly: Also. Bars are dark. Pupils dilate in the dark. This means I want every dude I (semi-)see!