“Don’t talk down to me! I know how to conjuncturate my adjectibles!”

As a non-American living in Europe, I and everyone I know would struggle after “Er, Michael Jordan? Wait, isn’t he retired? I don’t know.”

Perhaps he’d learn quicker if he was whipped in the balls every time he didn’t meet expectations.

Trust me, there’s got to be at least one guy out there who can only orgasm when he’s thinking of clipping through the universe and falling into an infinite void.

If only he’d bashed someone’s head into his own helmet he’d have nothing to apologize for.

It’s great that everything is equally canon in the new continuity, so any shovelware nonsense they may come out with is equally as relevant as The Force Awakens!

It looks like this will be the main Avengers team, since it’s got the latest versions of the heroes who have traditionally been core members of Earth’s MIghtiest Heroes.

Pictured, PinballMonster typing that comment:

It means you’re sexually confused as a result of repressed childhood trauma.

Is it just me losing my mind, or does his mouthguard look like comedy racist lips right there?

Just because something is a comic-book cliche doesn’t make it excusable.

“If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits 88 Frames Per Second... you’re gonna see some serious shit.”

Yet he’s still in charge of the Avengers and not in jail or under any sort of censure.

I agree. That’s one of the reasons I mainly follow Marvel these days, even though, to be honest, I prefer DC... Or rather, the stuff DC put out before the New 52. At least Marvel doesn’t throw the baby out with the bathwater every five years (No, Secret Wars is not a ‘hard’ reset like a Crisis, it’s a ‘soft’ reset…

I take issue with the concept that he’s ever actually paying for his crimes in more than extremely short term ways. After Siege went down he refused to apologise to anyone and said he’d do all the shitty things he’d done before again if he had the chance, and their response was “Oh, Tony! That’s why we love you!”

So…

I wouldn’t call the way comics are always drawn back to a status quo ‘fluidity’ - quite the opposite, actually - but semantic quibbles aside, I agree with you. Even the longest-running and best-loved changes- like Wally West replacing Barry Allen as the Flash or Peter and M.J. finally getting married- will inevitably…

Aaaactually, after the reboot Tony’s the broke one and Peter’s the one with a multinational.

Wait, wait... If they were never married, then why the fuck did she ever live in Avengers Tower? I find it significantly harder to buy that Spider-Man brought his on-and-off girlfriend to be a resident there than he did his married family.

It would’ve been hilarious if you’d found him driving something like a Prius or a Smart Car.

I’m more talking about his character arc from Civil War onwards. Superior Iron Man only made it explicit.