Who is this retail person giving a shit about what someone buys with their own money? They just wasted time that could have been spent arranging things on a rack with their eyes glazed over, or y'know doing actual work if there is any to do. Plus, it was a debit card, so who cares? He proved that it was his with the…

Exactly! I know what shoddy stitching looks like, and that is an invaluable thing to know when shopping for any clothes, from cheapy H&M stuff to grown up blazers and dresses. Always, always check the seams to make sure you are not buying something that will fall apart or look slightly odd because there are mistakes…

Well now I do.

Can I just say how much I love your name tag idea! I laughed so hard! A nice hearty laugh. Such a shame that probably no one at that party would get it, and you'd be That Person by the end of the night, the one yelling "The Republic of Chad! Get it? It's a fucking country in Africa! Gawd!"

Some thoughts on my personal appearance:

Well, at least there'll still be Keith Richards.

I want to see it, it's just Disney makes it so hard to watch their stuff without buying it, and then they throw it in the vault or whatever. When it first came out I was totally interested because it was the first not CGI or sequel they had done in a long time, more like what I remembered when I was a kid, but I never…

Ah. I am really behind on my Disney movies. there was a time when I would have already known that :(

I would say that this little fella is adorable, but my dog's purpose in life is to kill all the squirrels (especially the little cute ones), so it would feel a little like a betrayal. Terriers!

Where is this from?

Would you have trained your children to attempt an elaborate jewel heist/liquor store robbery with you as the leader too?

That is the worst. Why do they do that? The same thing happened to my boss when her boss was let go. They should have promoted her, because she has so much experience and already does all the work anyway, and then when the old boss is gone they hire a new guy, and she's in the same position.

Me too!!!!

I would love to think that I would make some kind of crazy pyramid costume, but I'm pretty lazy, so I think I'd just pour a cup of water over the person in the KKK outfit and claim that I am supposed to be Victoria Falls. Repeat until forcibly removed from party and call the evening a success.

Yes!

Seconded.

It takes screaming goats to make a John Mayer song tolerable.

Anyone consider that this song is just literally about birds? Anyone?

Kelly Sheehan, you win the prize.

Awful lyrics aside, this song is incredibly boring. I could not listen to the whole thing, I just kept moving it forward to see if it gets interesting. It did not. So, unless the song got super awesome in those parts that I missed, I don't get the point of this song. It's not even boring enough to sleep through…