No, no. You’re just mistaken.

“I’ll have the Kidde’s meal”

I’m not THAT much better than that, let’s  be honest.

I think a car uses that building to store its collection of rich guys.

A Ferrari collection?

I think there was stuff inside that building.

They'd need all of their cars to run at the same time. 

They moved on after 6 hours.  Everyone wins.  Well, except their kids, who are still waiting to be picked up from practice.

Nah. They took all their built-up tension to the bedroom.

I thought only Taco Bell served explosive food.

Shrek yo self before you wreck yo self.

Better than standing there with their finger and their thumb in the shape of an ‘L’ on their forehead.

David, how can you warm your cars up if they won’t start ?

David, have you made an offer on the Jeep, yet?

So I probably shouldn’t have watched that video at work without headphones, got a ton of dirty looks from my coworkers. Not because of the sound, but because I was masturbating.

Except the user agreement with facebook doesn’t literally say that and this guy’s lease literally says to keep his car in good condition, which he signed.

Read the paperwork, bro. The policy was there before you got there and it will be there after you leave.

Good point. If it’s water cooled, they should call it the Corvwet.

for the love of god i want to put some supportive caster wheels so bad

Service animals and emotional support animals are not the same.