but what if i wet the house first 

“...with the progressive and innovative leadership of NBA Commisioner Adam Silver.”

Ok bro. 

Nobody. In fact, I am a middle-aged white male who has benefitted enormously from the status quo.

Short answer? “Soft power.”

No, if women wanted to make it in film, they’d just do better work.

BUT LOOK AT THAT WINGSPAN

You have precise and refined fast food opinions, and I respect the shit out of that. 

Well, yeah, it’s October, the foliage is awesome, not sure who needs convincing to give in and enjoy it.

For real, the ending is soooo good.

For real, the ending is soooo good.

Behind Mike Glennon at the movie theater?

Reasonable take that requires assuming that football coaches are smart, or at least capable of rational self-interest.

I need this kind of tough love in my life.

They’re on top of the world and are in control of the whole game, but can’t stop playing the victim card and whining like pathetic losers about how much everyone is out to get them. It’s not only annoying, it’s completely counterproductive, as they’re going to wake up soon on the bottom of the world, with no one to…

Computers can totally handle the ball and strike calls, but it’s their AI’s inability to manufacture sufficiently batshit insane petty grudges that’s holding back the robot umpiring revolution.

Poise pollution. 

He likes football as a friend but doesn’t LIKE-like it, you know? Like, he doesn’t want to go with football to Kaitlyn-with-a-K’s party because he’s going with Catelynn-with-a-C, but he’s not going to be mad if he sees football there, he hopes they can be chill. 

It really felt like Osaka threw the game to Serena right after she was awarded one on penalty. She couldn’t be too blatant because Tennis Rules but it sure seemed that she was trying to even it out after the BS ruling.

So instead of ‘Stats by Lopez,’ I first read his website as rhyming with ‘Gatsby,’ like he nicknamed himself ‘Statsby’ because of his lavish and luxurious Excel sessions. I’m sticking with it.

-10 Deadspin points to me for forgetting about Dez Caught It. But first time I’ve heard the Fail Mary framed through Tate.