Let me introduce you to the concept of criminal harassment (this is Massachusetts but you have plenty of examples to choose from):

BACK OFF GUYS THE INTERNET LAWYER IS HERE

I am currently unsigned by any MLB team, may I attend?

For me getting out of the greys was just a matter of killing a great joke right as a post went up. A little skill but a lot of luck and timing.

Hey just curious, are star counts down for everyone or has my phone gone weird?

Hahaha you are either really thick or just convincing at playing thick

Yeah, the problem here is the system is still hardwired around retroactively rewarding your performance when you finally hit FA, but there are no front offices left that believe that’s a smart way to spend money.

This is a good and important lawsuit.

Which also raises the point that a clock is a terrible choice of metaphor for something that moves back and forth at different and unpredictable rates. Everything about how the Doomsday Clock works is not at all how clocks work.

Yeah, fuck that doomsday clock, and thank you for saying it. The other thing from having that trotted out all the time is it destroys the credibility of anyone who obsesses over it and lowers the bar way, way too far.

Can verify. Used to live across from a small theater in the late 90s and would watch people stream out after The Matrix trying to do spin kicks on each other. It never went well.

Fair. “Well within the bounds of acceptable risk-taking and potential for self-harm that our society tolerates in private behavior” is probably better.

Ooh. I’m thinking a rant about Big Soap trying to monetize the basic human need for cleanliness, then a description of how he procures lards and oils at the farmers market and turns them into bulk artisanal soap in his apartment bathtub.

wait a minute

No...it isn’t.

Ahem...’counsel’

Girls were never supposed to be invited to all these treehouses that boys built back in the day.

Raping a bad guy in retaliation for him raping someone else doesn’t even the score at Good Guys 1- Bad Guys 1. It makes it Rape 2, Civilization 0.

Oh god, that whole letter from Dickcheese Anusfart* was a special kind of awful. The kind of person who presents as so reasonable and “hey I’m just trying to talk like civilized people here,” then bangs out the most toxic bullshit on their keyboard.

Beliefs contrary to theirs are the only ones that qualify as political. Saying everyone should stand for the flag and venerate the military, and that God made men and women and that’s it...well, that’s not political, that’s just common sense.