“Lying there and getting fucked” is not easy when it hurts like hell and you’re not actually enjoying it because no matter how many times you’ve communicated to your partner, he doesn’t know how to actually use his fingers, or where to find the clitorus after you’ve gently tried showing him several times.
You also…

Nipple stimulation is so underrated. But, I don’t like it when other people touch my nipples, so conundrum. :S

Seriously, having a dude watching me while I masturbate is the LEAST attractive thing and will make me less likely to get off.

speak for yourself. You’re replying to a thread regaring orgasms. Who’se triggered now? Hmmm?

You’re supposed to lick the clit, not the hole, dunce. You get an F.

After being with a guy a few times and really only engaging in Penis-in-Vagina sex - he got off every time and I never. The one time I decided to masturbate, he got really angry with me and asked me, “What the fuck was that?” Never again. That was the end of that.

Yes, there is nothing quite like invoking my gag reflex to make my enjoyment more pleasurable... Nope.

She can’t even pull an Edward Snowden and move to Russia - they’de probably return to back to the US with a note for the POTUS saying, “Did you lose something?”

Did she actually roll her eyes at him? The resolution is a bit funky, but it honestly looks as though she may have actually rolled her eyes.

I would much rather watch Starship Troopers Space Football or Quidditch over ‘normal’ American Football any day. Although, not muggle Quidditch.

I recommend reading excerpts from Mein Kampf, then. It’s a lot of the same rambly, inarticulated gobbledigook. Instead of spending money on that drivel, you can read some of it here:

As of Jan 20, I feel like images such as these will be relegated to the field of contraband. Anyone found in possession of them will be threatened with arrest and or deportation.

I’m glad someone mentioned Rob Ford’s Crackgate scandal here, because since the whole Russian pee-pouree dossier storm surfaced, that has been something on my mind. The parallels between Ford’s “stopping the gravy train” and Trump’s “cleaning out the swamp” rhetoric, not to mention the nepotism, are striking.

He probably keeps telling himself, “nice guys finish last” over and over again, to make himself feel better.

It sounds like the mom is doing the barber-y in this family. Yikes.

...because anything you say and/or do can and will be used against you in a court of law. Except in politics. All is fair in love and war. God, we’re so fucked.

If anything, 2016 taught me that it is possible to fail so hard publicly, act like an ass, lie straightfaced and deny everything, and still get out on top. I don’t believe in Karma. 

I shaved my head a couple of years ago; everyone at my workplace thought that I had “lost a bet”, even long after I told them that I did it for other personal reasons. The typical narrative that they wanted to run with was the standard heteronormative trope. I should have taken that as a sign. They thought that I was…

I wouldn’t want to use a lotion with methanol in it on my skin - it can dissolve the lipids in your skin (so can ethanol, but less dangerous).

Like actually bothering to translate the Russian would have been a nice touch. IS this what kids are getting away with in school these days?