I do not have the emotional fortitude to stay with a serial philanderer, but I like to think if I did, I'd handle it Anjelica style.

I've always known I liked her. Now I have reasons.

So it's gonna be forever

And yet I get arrested whenever I get naked to fight homophobia.

THAT YOU KNOW OF.

Hey, if you're not a creep you shouldn't be butthurt when dudes who are creeps are put on blast.

Rihanna watches over me always.

I AM AT A QUANDARY

Periods are no one's favorite things until you have that first pregnancy scare. Then you learn to appreciate periods reeeeeeal quick.

Periods are no one's favorite things.

How have you not seen this photo?!

And to be fair, the State of Alabama was formed to work slaves to death.

Apparently the ambulance wasn't the only thing leaking fluids, amirite?

I love her. This summer I went through a breakup and one night I was at some bar, wasted and dancing my little heart out, and they put on a remix of "Habits" that changed my life right there. Like a religious experience involving me trashed and bouncing around, emphatically mouthing the words to a song about doing…

All the way to the motherfuckin' top.

I worry about kitchen fires or being so drunk I talk myself out of a nice steamed fish with veggies and into a bunch of pasta topped with fried cheese.

#Notallstraightwhitedudes

Also, what is it about straight white dudes and only knowing how to do one pose in photos?

I feel sorry for them too, until one of them gets his hands on a gun and goes Elliott Rodger on a bunch of innocent people.

DO NOT QUESTION MY FEMINIST MATH SIR OR MADAM