"THE RED COATS ARE COMING! THE RED COATS ARE COMING!"

You don't have to do this. You know it's a terrible joke. It's not funny and no one will like it. All you're doing by writing this is begging for validation via the lowest possible means. You could be doing so much more with your time. You have the whole night to yourself, you can relax and read and watch a little TV.…

They also tried to make a Rick Pitino version, but the filling spurted out before anyone was satisfied.

This is absolutely disgusting. I've gone a long time pretending this shit didn't exist, and that was perfectly fine until it started getting thrown in my fucking face. This has gone too far. Now I'm going to have to explain to my children that OWN is an actual TV network.

No one wants to find out that Lou Gehrig's farewell speech was copywritten by a dude at Pfizer.

Well, now he's going to have to be a pitcher, as his elbow no longer bends far enough for him to reach his belly.

Trouble with the Nerve

Yeah, trying to say this is a world record is kind of Grace Ping at straws.

Because this is what is sounds like, when droves die.

"We find this salacious report from The Guardian to be completely without merit. Frankly, we've covered this ground before and we are well protected in our activities by the Constitution of the United... wait, what? Oh, droves! Ha, droves, ok, got it! Yeah, that's fine. No further comment."

Muhammad Ali's Shake Shack is a rousing success though.

Married with Linemen

Sex and the CTE

Apparently the NBA constitution hasn't heard of a little thing called the first amendment.

In 2003, a court order noted Sterling was accused of "regularly [posing] as a government official in order to gain access to tenants' apartments."

Based on how he was raised, I'm surprised Hunter didn't slap the umpire back. His parents instilled the importance of an "i for an i".

MU Comm '08 grad. Me too!

marquette '13 communications graduate here. you'll be happy to know that i'm gainfully employed in a field my major (journalism) had nothing to do with.

The Bucks could at least have come up with a better slogan than just stealing Ted Cruz's alternative suggestion to the Affordable Care Act.

Touché.