I'm no scientist, but I'm pretty sure we have the technology to do that. Good idea buddy, let's get to work on it.

Meanwhile, the fucking Marlins won’t even explore this idea- Come on Jeter, answer Saskatoon’s calls you coward!!!

Manager: “FELIZ!!?!?!?!!!11!!?!”

If someone kills Steve Harvey and replaces him with Kenan, I feel like we could all just go with it, pretend like nothing happened and not say anything.

I’m glad we can take this moment to reinforce the truth that Keenan Thompson... is good.

IDK, it keeps old Boomers away from Fox News and Facebook for 4 hours most weekends, so it’s not all bad.

Kind of poor taste to name the tournament after Slovakia’s failed space shuttle launch, which was just a Lada strapped to an unarmed ICBM.

America’s pastime at America’s pastime.

Some of you may be shocked that he does this, but how else do you think Bob gets permits approved so fast?

“Tell me about it.”

This is what you get when you go outside the box and let Werner Herzog try color announcing.

It bothers me that Mark Jackson isn’t the third biggest sociopath on that famous basketball card of his.

Where is the Canadian version of First Take?

I’m pretty sure A-Rod is creating a Jackson Pollock in there.

Barry’s obviously stealing headlines from my Jurassic World fansite content, which answers the question of why the T-Rex saves everyone at the end.

having perhaps grown tired of seeing his athletic feats credited to a small baby who cannot even speak or control its bowels

For me, every Barry blog is The Onion’s “The Worst Person You Know Just Made a Great Point”

I saw ‘Competitive Musical Chairs’ and was honestly surprised to not find a photo of head coaches from the NFL’s Annual Meeting.

There hasn’t been a blurred dog that funny since Steve Sarkisian put a hat on the Washington Husky when he’d hide in its kennel drinking bottles of Canadian Club before and after UW practices.

what a missed opportunity.....damnit