1.) That was the longest sentence I've ever read
2.) I won't care if he is innocent, it won't effect me
3.) I don't believe in god, or being holy so I certainly don't think of myself that way
4.) Yes, I work "ith the DA". It's me, THE DA!!!1!!
5.) Surprised you knew my courtroom nickname, "court jester"
6.) Not sure how…

.

Johnny said to the police officer when he got pulled over, "Yes officer, I blew a .345, but SHE just blew a 3.45...EHHHHH!?!?!! EHHHHHH?!?!?!"

And that's why they pay you the no bucks.

Well, when you're dealing with blue balls, you can pretty much always expect the release to be especially epic.

That's really strange.

I lol'd in my office at this. Well done.

I know half of a magician's face that would totally agree with that title.

We here. Go Pirates.

Stupid Auburn. You can't just give yourself National Titles, you have to BUY them like everyone else.

Nati Light?

Barbacoa.

So, same exact joke as my joke. Great job.

"The future of the NBA is looking pretty dark."

So weird that Donald Sterling would create a burner and try to defend himself in the comment section of Deadspin.

The Little Giant Bongrips

lol

The Waterbong

The Bongest Yard

Hey girl, did it hurt? When you fell from heaven when you were rejected for not being of pure race?