It’s like charring your steak to a crisp and then drowning it in ketchup.

As a non USA voting Canadian, who would have voted left wing anyways. I remember saying:

About the same as putting your cold drink (that’s dripping condensation) on the pool table.

It’s like taking a dump midcourt after you finish your pickup game and leaving. Messes everything up for the groups behind you and the janitor who has to clean it up (in this case, the groundskeeper who is gonna have to repair the damage). Complete lack of awareness/compassion for anyone else. In other words, this one…

It’s like scooping a giant hole in the ice of an ice hockey ring.

This clip has the potential to do more damage to the Trump Administration than any other scandal.

It’s the equivalent of wearing golf cleats on the court in pickup basketball.

Everyone has their own inflection points. Takes a strong person to hold one’s convictions in the face of race baiting, misogyny, alleged election fraud, alleged collusion with a foreign power within your campaign team, charity mismanagement, impetuousness, incessant Twitter farts, suggesting violence against your…

“I wanted to give him a chance. He seemed like a real winner, but this has gone too far.” - At least one of my uncles.

Shit, even I don’t want a picture of my own dick. Ew.

I swear, men are so stupid. Zero people want pictures of our dicks.

The thought of having one today makes my pancreas want to slither out of my ass and shrivel in the summer sun.

I can’t even begin to fathom what the fart profile of that combination is.

Not food, but as a teenager I used to drink roughly 12 Mountain Dew Code Reds a day. Early morning. Late night. Didn’t matter. I guarantee I drank five times more Code Red than I did water. Looking back, I can’t believe that my teeth didn’t dissolve into a fine powder and that I somehow didn’t go blind.

Ate an entire 13x9in home-made chicken pot pie at one sitting. I’m not sure if I disappointed my parents or made them proud.

I used to eat a whole Hot’N’Ready without a problem. I would even get territorial if anybody asked for a slice.

I once ate a 90 count of Totino’s pizza rolls in one sitting. (‘Roni or get the fuck out.) I think I could feel my colon getting cancer. Maybe I was just high. Okay, I was definitely high as balls. Take that, asshole!

My freshman year of college, I completed the “pizza two mile” with several of my cross-country teammates. One whole Papa John’s large cheese pizza, eight laps on a track. Eat a slice, run a lap, continue for eight of each. I finished the ordeal in 16 minutes and 17 seconds, and it remains both my greatest athletic and…

Sounds like Admiral Jazzy Pants is just thinking about himself instead of what’s good for the company.