I really wish that Oprah had never brought Dr.’s Phil & Oz out of the grays.

I’m sorry, but who among us would not fuck Harrison Ford, especially Han Solo-Harrison Ford? It is for this reason (as well as murder Hitler when he was just a shitty art student, and someone else I won’t mention in case the Feds are watching) I would build a fucking time machine. To fuck Han Solo/Raiders of the Lost…

“I would be very careful about exercising your First Amendment right to freedom of speech. Free speech in a Trump administration extends only to fawning praise, not to criticism or dissent of any kind. You knew this when you voted us in.” -said the scorpion to the fucked democracy.

No puppet, no puppet. You’re the puppet.

Exactly. We had two incredible leaders. Sadly that has come to pass.

I hope he sets up an A-Team style group of renegade do-gooders who comically thwart the cartoonishly evil GOP policies at every turn.

Just because Exaggerator won the Preakness doesn’t mean he should be put in charge of the stable.

Kate McKinnon is an openly LGBT woman, and one could argue that the rhetoric of the Trump/alt-right has been more vitriolic towards those folks (actually, one hardly has to argue the point as there’s already some discussion about going after gay marriage in some circles). So no, I think Kate was the perfect choice.

Giuliani’s daughter is 17 years younger than Ivanka and never supports her dad. No excuse.

It occurred to me that she was conceding to a person who has publicly vowed to use the power and violence of the state against her were he to gain the presidency.

I’m ready for the United States of the Pacific

NO. Sorry, but no. This is not Hillary Clintons fault. This is the fault of the people who voted for Donald Trump in spite of every monstrous thing he’s said and done for the past 50 years, and of anyone who didn’t take it seriously or thought it couldn’t happen. This is the fault of anyone who doesn’t know shit about…

I have a lot of foolish friends who support him as the #NotHillary, stick-with-the-party vote. They are assuredly foolish, but not terrible people. And I pity them because they’re so misguided.

You were robbed.

And mine: A rotting Orange Julius flung into the parking lot of a failing mall.

As do I.