@AzureTexan: I often hold myself out as a short-order cook.

Now that Larry Miller's undermined and forced his hall of fame Coach to retire and traded the cornerstone of his team's future for pennies on the dollar he can finally bring his ultimate plan to fruition and move the Jazz back to New Orleans. Things are looking up.

@♥ Always Winning: Nice.

NBA groupies will stop at nothing to make inroads with the new kid on the block. Nice beard.

Let it go. You had your 15 seconds of fame.

@Bevraj of Choice: It's not as dangerous as his uppercunt.

I may be too late in the evening to get much of a response to this, but...

@CalvinandJahv: You mean the trees? Rose went to Alabama? What? I'm confused.

Yeah, I took the blue pill a couple of nights ago, and it's been glorious.

The International Society for the Advancement of Urolagnia has already backed Wahl's efforts to relieve Blatter.

@Gamboa Constrictor: I can't decide if I'm happy, sad, infuriated or indifferent that you didn't spell Arli$$ with dollar signs.

(silently taps nose with tip of index finger)

Have you ever seen Pat Burrell and Comment Ninja in the same place? I didn't think so.

Nick is selling Deadspin to settle with Irving Picard: 6.5 Billion to 1.

My son has pissed in my face. I've caught my daughter's shit as it streamed out her like carvel into my sugar cone hand. But nothing, and I mean nothing, made me as sick as when I took our twat pediatrician's advice and sucked the congested mucous out of my daughter's infant nose. I spat out all I could, but some of…

They're just BEGGING for it. After all, you can't abbreviate Valentine's Day without V.D.

Two great moments from Season One: (1) when TSA goes through his bag at airport security; (2) the entire bullying/Staten Island episode.

I'd say that the answer depends on what type of work you're going to be doing. If you're doing something that requires you to follow direction and implement the decisions of your superiors, they'll find someone else to do the job you've been offered. If you being hired to do something that requires more independent…

You must be referring to those from the suburbs, because Milwaukee's Best is available at many of your finer gas stations.

Those must be constructed from man-made snow. They look as hard as rocks.