So, you should give me a call if your ever in NYC ;-)

I'm just... not seeing it.

I'd assume he's gonna capture me and sell me to Jabba the Hutt for a large bounty.

"Ellen and Portia de Rossi Break"

... aaaaaand my heart stopped beating.

"The Internet"

Is that all? Phew!

Michael Ian Black Wins! FATALITY!

This recently happened to someone I know through Mr. Hag's work; famous artist who has NO trouble getting exposure was asked to do art for a multi-million dollar fight in Vegas for not even a ticket.

Isn't "exposure" something you die from?

My favorite was performing inside the main entrance at the ACC for the Toronto Maple Leafs, lady took my card then called me the next day, wanting me to perform for free at her kids school. "But there will be 300 families there! Think of the exposure!". As opposed to where you saw me, in front of 20,000 people?

Oprah herself bit the heads off of chickens before becoming a news anchor. I'm not sure it had anything to do with "exposure" though.

It's funny how the booker expected Revolva to do the gig for "exposure", since after all, Revolva already has enough exposure to draw the interest of a booker for Oprah. So, yeah, her exposure meter is pretty full, whereas the rent goes unpaid.

When your parents name you Revolva, it really limits your future choice of profession. It was always going to be this or carousel operator.

If this performer had projected her wishes into the universe a bit more strongly, if she had eaten , prayed and loved over it, she'd have the life she wants. You're spiritually lazy, hula-hooper. Put some soul into it, woman.

There is a precedence to this though. Bill Gates wound up making his fortune when someone noticed his firebreathing act when he used to open gratis for REO Speedwagon, and Warren Buffet got his start working for free as a ring girl in backyard wrestling tournaments that were frequented by Wall Street talent scouts.

"And, what would you have had him print?", she wrote with a waggle of her eyebrows!

You just made my whole day. Bless you.

I used have really consistent buttne, until it dawned on me that I could use my oil-free acne face wash on my butt. It's like my version of windex. Wash my face, a little on the chest (especially after a run), a little on the bikini line (totally helps prevent ingrowns), and a little on the butt. I don't even really…

Dear god.

That's way too much cheekbones for one family. Their offspring will probably be a high elf who shall herald the return of the Eldar onto Middle-Earth.

I always thought it was called "assne".

Oh, I didn't realize the price was just for the pattern. Eep, it does get more expensive then-though you still could probably get 'em printed at shapeways. Also, if you're at a sufficiently hipster city, you could probably get 'em made at a makerbot storefront/something similar.