This happened to me once when I was little for like an afternoon after I acted up in a Mexican restaurant

Too early to jump to conclusions here. How do we know that’s not last year’s tree?

I guess it also stands for Fuck Shells University.

Joe Flacco: [reads article]

Mike Leach, folks! He’ll be here all week!

Guess he must have seen something in the game tape.

You stepped on my comment, you simpleton. What did you think was going to happen?

Just zoom in, stupid.

Mr. Okafor’s shirt isn’t meant to be a show of support, Patrick. He’s just referring to what price he’ll take for a scrub-ass son who can only score ten points in a month.

Make fun of him all you want, but I defy anyone reading this to find a single goddamn crumb on that mat.

This kind of shit would never happen under Madjer’s predecessor, Sami Calmjer. He also had temper issues but didn’t talk so much with his hands.

Eric has ruined multiple games of fetch by chucking his dog 80 yards on the fly and dumping a can of wet food on a tennis ball.

When Eric fell into the gorilla cage at the zoo as a child, onlookers were terrified that there’d be a bloodbath until zookeepers tranquilized the young man.

I bet Don Jr. wishes he was as strong as his brother Eric. Dude can’t even pet a fluffy rabbit without breaking its neck.

the NCAA did something reasonably logical for once when it reversed its initial ruling and made Beverly immediately eligible to play for NC State.

Can’t Hit vs. Convicts

On the bright side, Ned is now the second person to discover gravity.

though he writes that all of this happened when he “was a horny 23 year old guy,” his tweet indicates that he turned 23 in March.

He’ll be a “bracketologist” in the Fox studio throughout the season.

Zach Miller: [wakes up in hospital after surgery]