I just sent this in but I am a grey and it probably won’t get read. In negotiations for a three-some with my current male lover we had a plan whereby I was having a promising third man (who is bi) over. I was to warm him up to the idea and then invite lover #1 over. I wrote: “He is adorable. I can’t wait to have you…

"Hopefully the man in question will make a full recovery..."

If by "full", you mean that he lives. Sure. If by "full", you mean that his procreative abilities are unharmed... well, let's just say that whatever he's doing, let natural selection just filter his particular bent out of the gene pool.

Because all minority men walk around with their pants sagging, wear baggy shorts and cutoff shirts, or track suits - amirite?

I would go husband hunting, but hunting licenses have been really hard to get ever since the local husband population was decimated by chick flicks and demancaveification.

You obviously know nothing about Arkansas. In a four city metropolitan area, we have Walmart (you know, the largest retailer/biggest private employer/second largest public corporation) and Tyson (the world's second largest food processor) and JB Hunt (the US's second largest transportation company). Although we aren't…

I think it's shitty to blame men for feeling this way, frankly. We have been largely raised from birth to believe that we should provide. Whether that is "true" or not is a different story, but this is a constant message. You know how we all shake our heads at the social messages about beauty for women? This is…

Yeah, I'm in unincorporated St. Louis county. My neighborhood contracts out snow-plowing services, so there are trucks coming through about every 30 minutes (which is great). The main roads around here, though, are always a hot mess.

while I actually do alright in social situations it is basically an acting job. I fake it till I make it

You have so much more faith in MoDOT than I do. So much more faith.

(You're here in STL, right?) Well, it doesn't help that we'll be getting snow tomorrow. So much so that I won't even get the chance for Sunday dinner. This makes me extremely sad, btw. Rude.

Wind chills are expected to be -20 to -30 Monday morning.

STRUCK PENIS ON SPEAKER BOX

I am a baseball umpire. NCAA certified and all that jazz, so I do a lot of higher level ball. A year ago I was doing an American Legion game and took a 90 mph fastball straight into the cup. It was shattered and I was coughing up blood. NOT FUN

Get price quotes on comparable yardwork to argue the value of the service you're doing, if that $work + $water/sewer/garbage + $800 > comparable rent in the area, you're in a great place to bargain.

I was never here. I didn't read this. I'm going to go smoke pot, go back to bed, and when I wake up I will remember nothing.

My wife met my Aunt for the first time when she emerged from my room in the basement wearing her walk of shame clothes. My Aunt (the best) said- "Good Morning, Skinny Ass- you want a bloody mary?"

I met my BFs grandfather for the first time when he popped the bedroom door open early in the morning to greet his grandson...and found us engaged doggy-style.

It's an equal opportunity object.

I would bang him like a screen door in a hurricane. And now, back to my classy, housewifey self.