Can I just ask, was everyone like encouraged to drink and party at his high school? Like was that just an accepted part of life there, becoming a functional alcoholic before you could drive? Like where were the parents? Off at a charity function that’s actually a key party in disguise?

is beach week like the prep school version of spring break? I’m from Texas and I guess this is my public school education showing but I’ve never heard of beach week. 

Hey that’s how my brother got Mono! 

Maybe his parents caught him stealing from the liquor cabinet

Same.

Agent: Paul Feig wants you in Ghostbusters.

no advice about girls, I figure that’s better left up to his parents who are awesome feminists by the way (they take him to the women’s marches/march for our lives) 

I think the last time I texted a 14 year old was this past summer when I texted my little cousin (he’s not little anymore he’s like 6 feet he’s taller than me) happy birthday

Me at age 12: what’s the deal with pride and prejudice it seems boring

-watching the This is us super bowl commercial

My mom and I have a unspoken agreement that if a Trader Joes is to open near our house we would apply to work there together. If anything getting paid Above minium wage (shockingly low here in Texas) and being able to qualify for insurance (had a cousin work at one in California for a while and say it was top notch) af…

I watched the movie and swear to god, I honestly thought that it was super cool that Mark Ruffalo’s son was old enough to be acting now and that his dad was allowing him to follow him as a actor.

Yeh like he’s super Irish (the O’ part of his last name gives it away) but the Beto has literally been apart of his existence since he was like 2. Because he’s from El Paso, literally one of the most Hispanic cities in all of Texas 

GUYS BETO IS GONNA BE ON ELLEN NEXT WEEK! HES GONNA DANCE ONTO THE STAGE AND INTO AMERICA’S ♥️

Trump has always been terrible. Sometimes it seems like it’s not so bad because someone hides the phone from him for a few days but then something like this past week (basically three people close to Trump was either indicted, pleaded guilty, or got immunity in exchange for working with investigators) and suddenly its…

Him: I’m having lots of sex.

Gotta say, I’ve seen Mamma Mia 2 TWICE (the news is terrible this day and I can’t resist a movie where Cher sings ABBA despite being a 26 year old who should know better) now and both times they showed the trailer for this and I’m partly interested in this mainly because my hero Spielberg is a producer on this (if…

I know a lot of theatres in my area (DFW area) have half off days at least once a week, so tickets are usually only 4/5 bucks a pop rather than 7/9. Last time I paid 9 bucks for a movie was for Incredibles 2, mainly because the first evening showing of the day was the only one that wasn’t sold out.

-I mean I know Carrie Fisher had two houses on her property (besides the guest house) but that was a case of buying the house next door and removing the fence because Debbie had just divorced husband number 3 and had to sell her house in order to pay the legal fees and wanted to be close to her grandchild but like,…

I don’t think Sarah Hukabee Sanders is ugly, but in the words of my drag queen uncle “She has seen some ugly shit. No wonder she’s starting to look like a sourpuss.”