Wat? The real champions are the Cubs!

If I were Barack Obama (and I’m clearly not..) I would have punched Trump dead in his mouth hole for the whole birther thing. Barack Obama is fundamentally a better, more magnanamous person than I am, though.

You read my mind. Totally Beetlejuice!

I’m with you on the Sodastream. Got one as a wedding gift. We used it for awhile.. but going to the Bed Bath & Beyond to get a new cannister was a pain in my ass. I finally tossed it earlier this year after having sat atop my fridge collecting dust for the last two years.

I’ve lost my faith in humanity. I mean, deep down I secretly believed in the good of people. But apparently there is very little good in people. Neither a double helping of bacon or Katy Perry made me feel better this morning. I wasn’t feeling the music anymore. I wasn’t really enjoying the bacon. Honestly, even when…

Yes they are illegal in lots of places. But specifically in Illinois they are a felony. No other state has it classified as such.

I have never once gotten a sticker. Not when I lived in Lakeview. Not now in Albany Park. *SHAKES FIST AT SKY*

Illinois doesn’t give out stickers. Bastards! Up until this year you just got a lame slip of paper called your voting receipt. This year we all got concert style wristbands that say “I voted, did you?” We still also got the lame slip of paper.

I admit to owning this on DVD purely for the camp factor of motherfucking snakes on the motherfucking plane.

Those two get around though. The first few seasons were in Toronto but they are also doing shows in North Carolina and also in the suburban New York area. They also did some stuff down in Texas.. Austin, I think.

I just died a little.. jumper cables to your nuts? I don’t own a pair of nuts but that seems like it would be...painful.

I bet Gretchen Wilson was comfortable AF in those leggings and slouchy over the knee boots.

I think I’ve developed an ulcer from this WS. I took to braiding MrMojito’s hair during the 9th inning. He humored me.

I get my occasional maple syrup from Aldi. Ain’t no shame in my game!

Speaking of bacon, I like to bake mine in the oven with real maple syrup and cracked pepper. It’s candy bacon.

I cannot take credit for that. A very tall friend of mine said it once and it stuck with me. :) Said friend had several bacon themed t-shirts as well.

I feel compelled to say it.. I can’t NOT say it...

Bacon is meat’s fruit! But I can dig it being a spice.

Boo. I really was hoping for traffic cone orange!

Taco soup. Because Tacos. Also, I make a mean chicken, kale and gnochi soup.