as an Australian nope. nooope. noope and fuck you to you both.

"We're holding a wedding in Iceland because my mom's best friend's stepson's girlfriend's half-sister went to Reykjavik once on a layover and we just know it's going to be special to the story of 'us'".

and in Australian, my reply to that is "cunts"

Is this all men? I literally barely ever heard a man tell a concise story. They just go all over the place and half the time I feel like they end up somewhere completely different than where they intended to go like half way through the story they just totally forgot what they were talking about.

I love my girlfriend, and my girlfriend loves her job. I do not love hearing the minutiae of my girlfriend's workday. I don't complain because I know she needs to get it out, but gah, sometimes I'm also trying to unwind after a long day at work.

I hate my husband because...

I used to work the fry section for Wagamama in Brisbane's Fortitude Valley. In those days, both of the most popular menu items (ie. the most Western-friendly) were from the fry section. Wagamama didn't take reservations, it was all walk-ins. One Wednesday night, four school groups walked in at the same time. On…

My absolutely wonderful fiance is the same with the meandering stories. And he'll say, "Anyway, long story short" like five times while he's telling it. I finally lost it one day and interrupted him with, "IF YOU SAY 'LONG STORY SHORT' FIVE TIMES DURING A STORY, YOU ARE NOT MAKING IT SHORT!!!"

I will do dishes with very few complaints, but every single time, I will not rinse the sink. I put the last dish in the dishwasher, turn it on, and peace out of the kitchen.

Hey Jessica, will you do a similar post on the best wedding presents? I feel like a greedy jackass but man I loved getting wedding presents :) Cash is all fine and good, but some of the gifts - oh my.

Haha what? No, that's not normal. I saw no such charge from any caterer I looked at.

This isn't my wedding, but a lady I used to work with casually dropped that she had 60k gladiolas planted in Argentina a year in advance for her wedding and they got the color balance wrong and she was devastated.

I really think all the racial stereotype jokes come around, even Jane Krakowski Native American thing. I am a little uneasy about that particular plot line and I think they could have done without it, but they bring it back way later in the series and I think tie it together ok. I think the joke about the litter was…

"Y'all ain't about to white guilt me out this check. Miss me with all that!"

God, there are plenty of people on the right just as bad or worse as Cruz ideologically, but I don't think any of them are as repulsive in every aspect as he is. No one else has that constant simpering jerks-off-in-a-mirror expression or that "I'm so taken with my own cleverness I can barely form a sentence" delivery.…

Is Poop still something you might put out?

Husband, two sons. My bathroom floor is a swamp.

I'd say get a DNA test, but I imagine the results would be that it's both of them.

I have a shared calendar with my husband for our bills. We can both see it and post to it. I keep 90% of our bills on there, and he only has to add a few, like his credit card bill. GUESS WHAT HE NEVER EVER DOES? Yeah.