All that upper body work doesn’t mean much in the real world, does it big guy?

Except for the fact that Diaz is making damn near the league minimum, but please continue.

Wow, he’s really lucky, because, while they take drug offenses super-seriously in New Hampshire, they recently repealed the death penalty. Not only that, but hanging was still on the books in NH as one of the possible means of execution, until earlier this year! So, he won’t have to worry about mobs of people…

With all due respect, this is the least problematic part of last night’s game. Matz is a good hitting pitcher (he got his second hit of the game that inning, and scored the tying run). There were two out, Mets were down 2-1. Matz had only thrown 79 pitches to that point and was flying through the Braves hitters.

I had to reread the 2nd and 3rd paragraphs a couple times to make sure I correctly understood what happened.

V. good.

The Athletic comment section is entirely made up of people going “Great article! This is why I pay for the Athletic!”

But if everyone is walking around you for 20 years telling you what a great guy you are and how great a job you are doing, you will never see your mistakes.

This car highlights why all those “tHe CoRvEtTe Is ThE bArGaIn SuPeRcAr!” tools frustrate the hell out of me. The Corvette was not intended to be a giant slayer, that’s not its nature. It is supposed to be a stylish vehicle with enough oomph to satisfy. It was to be seen in, and to be seen enjoying, just like this man…

Also, I’m filing a workplace report against you for threatening to pun...

I wonder who could have leaked such insider information a week after the pitching coach got shitcanned?

Just got home from the game. Congrats to the Blues and their fans. Enjoy, it’s gonna be a fun summer.

I believe, if you look again, you’ll find that Jeff Wilpon is penny foolish and pound foolish.

The last line sealed it for me. I laughed way too hard.

why doesn’t this have more stars

Roth is the best person on the planet when it comes to writing about Trump. His insight into the ways he imagines Trump thinks, feels, the things he’s motivated by, etc., are SPOT-ON.

As if that weren’t bad enough, this poor lady finally made it to the hospital, only to discover that this was her attending medical team:

Solid comment. 

A horse is a horse in court in court

Pretty sure this is actually a list of Bristol Palin’s exes.