I would totally marry my wife again if I got to wear this dress.

Listen to me, WishBone of Arc: you can walk away right now, without looking into this. You will be better off if you just decided that LadyGrinningSoul was exaggerating. Or lying, even. Tell youself she lied and walk away right now.

I mean, I feel like it can go either way. Some rich kids probably love the leg up and and some probably hate that they always have to wonder if their accomplishments resulted from their working hard or from their parents’ money/influence.

None. I got my period the morning of the wedding and I have menorrhagia (thankfully just in amount and not length, my period just wants to happen all at once). I was also recovering from a health issue that made it difficult to fly, so our honeymoon was just us driving back to our home state with my mother.

So on our…

As someone whose research is somewhat related to this type of argument, men and women’s brains do seem to be different and there is a increasing volume of research that suggests that men and women solve mental tasks in different ways (not better or worse just different) and so it is entirely possible that one type of…

Also when everything you claim to be better at is something you think is superior anyway. Shit with cars and chess (since chess skill is seen as possessing high intellect), being a leader, etc etc. They also give women ‘compliments’ about our emotional intelligence. It’s like saying...

Spoke to my father about this just a few hours ago. He was a police officer for 20+ years. He never shot his gun in that entire time and he said that if you are afraid of a cell phone, you should probably find another career besides being a police officer.

“Any police officer especially would have reacted in the exact same way I reacted”

She’s a writer on Conan. I follow her on twitter and she specifically mentioned your mention:

She looks like a tiny little mouse!

When I was in 4th grade, I was already nearly 5’10”. Which is my current height. I was basically a year from finishing puberty. They thought I had a pituitary tumor and might die. Turns out I just have a huge pituitary and some hormone disorders. Point is, shit was hard for youngrootof. Kids were fucking dickbags.

Bro reeking of Axe: “How would you like me down in your panties?”

Unfortunately the sickest burn I’ve ever heard was directed at me by my five-old-nephew. So during March break a year ago my parents and I were looking after him for my brother and sister-in-law. We took him to the Royal Botanical Gardens one day and on our way back as I’m buckling him into his car seat this happens:

An American colleague (relevant) tells this one about himself. He was on a plane in Japan, on final approach to Hiroshima, when he noticed how new the city’s architecture appeared from the window. His Japanese traveling companion replied, “yes, we had a fresh start in 1945.”

I don’t know if this is better or worse for being at a Renaissance Faire, but here goes!

In 1998, I was working at Paramount as a p.a. My boss was a smoker. The clean air act was in effect, so she was outside our studio, having a smoke. An “industry” type walking by said, “You know, secondhand smoke kills.” My boss arched one eyebrow, and without missing a beat replied, “Obviously not effectively.”

Being British and studying in the US, I acquired the rather unimaginative nickname ‘England’. I was sitting in my dorm room with my new boyfriend and a (finger)blast from the past, and the blast from the past casually mentions that we banged, and looks to the boyfriend for a reaction. Boyfriend’s jaw twitches a…

In high school, the reply “your mom” was super popular where I was (possibly years after it was popular everywhere else) and people used it constantly. Because I have a super dark sense of humor, I waited and waited for the perfect time when someone would thoughtlessly say that to me and it finally happened one day…

burns are great but reactions are better

My then-roommate and I were at a bar and a guy came up to her and said in the most cheesy, oily voice you can imagine, “Hey, just to save some time: how would you like your eggs in the morning?”