She sounds amazing!

I love your mom.

Your mom is my favorite. I wish my grandma with dementia had a similar outlook on life. Instead, she reads her calendar to me every time I call and likes to remind me, “growing old isn’t for the weak!”

I’ve never met your mother and I love her.

I love your grandmother. <3

Your mom is awesome.

Awwwwwww, this made me inexplicably tear up.

that is very cute and I approve.

It’s like that footage from one of Secretariat’s races. “Here’s Secretariat.” Camera pans back. “And here’s the rest of the field.”

THIS ONE QUICK TRICK will make you an Olympian in SECONDS! Swimming coaches HATE HIM!

Someone posted this on Deadspin I think, but I love this:

C’mon, it’s just a game. You’re ovareacting.

Bun her.

Eggcellent reporting. I hope they crack the case soon. Cheating like this is no yolk. People who spoil other’s fun really makes my blood boil. They are basically poaching gyms. Their accounts should be fried.

Man, gym battles have really become scrambled.

Was it murder-suicide?

OF COURSE it’s fucking KALE. OF COURSE.

“That other one”....you wrong. I saw Babs two weeks ago and she can still hit those notes belting “Don’t Rain on My Parade”.

What, I’m not good enough for you?

What, I’m not good enough for you?

I wouldn’t leave Canada for Somalia if I was gay.