I'm conflicted. I love Robin Wright, but she's stolen Ben Foster from me.

Ugh. I officially hate Twitter.

Wrong topic, post removed

Yup, I just asked my husband how he felt about money and he said, "If I weren't certain you'd stop me, I'd burn all of our money in the fireplace!" Then he took out his wallet and spit on it.

And this shit sits on my scalp for 30 minutes or longer? So poison used to kill rats, sitting on my scalp. Hurray!

As an entertainer, he is a reflection of the A&E brand. If they feel he's tarnished that brand they have every right to fire him.

Ah! I've learned something today. As someone who has never been to the area, I'm not up on the location lingo.

With Stacy London's capitalization of "Dumbo", I can only assume she's calling the staff a bunch of orphaned elephants with ears so big they can fly. Of COURSE they're going to give terrible service. They're cartoon elephants!

Channing Tatum stops working out four hours a day to be a dad: OMG, what's happened to him!

I'm not ashamed of enjoying this movie. Though, I've watched it so much that I've begun to HATE Linney's storyline. Look, lady, you can love your brother and want to take care of him AND take 45 minutes to yourself to get laid.

So Heidi Montag is a thing again? Super.

So...tempting.... But then he'll say something back that I don't understand and there will be an awkward silence.

No, when he left the church and abandoned his belief in the Bible I think he wanted to fill the empty hole with something else. So he chose aliens.

Yup. I blame his ultra-boring conservative lifestyle that he's lived his whole life for this overabundance of fantasy. Now I feel like calling him and talking human history.

He believes that humans were once slaves on his planet and we rose up against our alien masters and that's how we got here. So yeah. Stargate is slightly documentary to him. And with my mom's love for ancient Egypt fueling his imagination...talking to them can be fun.

Hold on. I'm not taking the blame for the fact that my dad is a crazy right wing conspiracy theorist who believes Stargate is a movie that should be shown on the history channel. No way. He did this to himself.

The new season of Girls will be upon us soon enough, resurrecting the Brilliant Everywoman, Lena Dunham, from the depths of her off-season loss of constant attention.

Land of the Free, my zero-dildoed ass!

It helps to hear stories like yours. I'm sorry you've suffered so much, but it's comforting to know that it's going to take more time to recover and that I'm not alone. At first I thought, "Yeah, I'll take some B12 for a few days and be all better!" Yeah...not so much.

Call me crazy, but if I were with an abusive man and decided to kill him, the very last thing I'd want to do is EAT him and literally have him inside of me, nourishing my cells and giving me life. That's just fucked up.